I decided to start a joke discussion because we as caregivers need our load lightened. We need to laugh at our own situations and those of others to take away the sting and pain we go through. If you have a joke that's racy then give a heads up at the beginning of your post for those who might not want to read your post. We need to avoid that kind of humor. Please don't come on this thread and berate anyone for their choices of humor. This is our place to let go of criticism. Thanks for sharing!!!! ;o)
Lots of quaranteens.
If it was flat, cats would have pushed everything off the edge by now!
A good start.
Sorry............that was in very poor taste but I couldn't resist.
The bra manufacturer has gone bust.
The specialist in submersibles has gone under.
The manufacturer of food blenders has gone into liquidation.
A dog kennel has had to call in the retrievers.
The Heinz factory has been canned as they couldn't ketchup with orders.
The suppliers of paper for origami enthusiasts has folded.
The tarmac laying company has reached the end of the road.
The bread Company has run out of dough.
The clock manufacturer has had to wind down and gone cuckoo.
The Chinese restaurant has been taken away.
The shoe shop has had to put their foot down and given their staff the boot.
The laundrette has been taken to the cleaners!
The pet shop has gone to the dogs.
The butcher's had the chop.
The veg man is in a vegetative state.
The venetian blind shop has closed, so it's curtains for us all
The wall paper shops taken a pasting.
The florists are now pushing up the daisies.
The fish n chip shop has been battered.
The milkman's lost his bottle and finally,
the bread man's toast.
Here’s one suitable for children:
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The mice ran up the clock.
The clock struck one,
The others escaped with minor injuries.
I thought I was wrong once but I was mistaken.
What's black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white and red?
Ans: A nun falling down the stairs
Ta Da! My pathetic attempts at humor
Well COVID-19 pandemic has finally affected me financially. In order to offset the extra cost for prepared food, electricity, cutting the grass, house repairs and gas prices, I’m needing to make some extra money on the side.
So...
I am now humbled to announce that I am selling Adult toys.
I hope no one is embarrassed to ask for them. I have all kinds, sizes and styles according to your needs. Discretion is guaranteed!!
I am more than willing and able to demonstrate any items for you. Ask for yours anytime.
I have everything listed below.
-Walkers
-wheelchairs
-oxygen tanks
-canes
-disposable diapers
-fixodent
and more!
copy n paste if you have a sense of humor!!!
But I will still be returning to this joke thread again and again.
All of our dogs think we quit our jobs to spend more time with them.
All of our cats think we got fired for being the losers that they always thought we were.
All of our narcissistic moms thought we were only there to serve their needs.
Agreed we need some humor to help us through this trying time.
The grocery stores in France look like tornadoes hit them. All that’s left is de brie.
I’ll tell you a coronavirus joke now, but you’ll have to wait two weeks to see if you got it.
Finland just closed its borders. You know what that means. No one will be crossing the finish line.
What do you tell yourself when you wake up late for work and realize you have a fever? Self, I so late.
Did you hear the joke about the germ? Never mind, I don’t want to spread it around.
Good luck on working the wording out!
I will wait and see how many people think this is a good idea before trying a new site. I’d appreciate suggestions about how to word the intro. “Naughty but nice is OK”? Or what? We don’t want anyone else insisting that filth was their ‘choice of humor’ and so within the guidelines.
Please answer.
https://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/video/news/video.cfm?c_id=1&gal_cid=1&gallery_id=219664
https://youtu.be/U4c5eo_3-y0