I decided to start a joke discussion because we as caregivers need our load lightened. We need to laugh at our own situations and those of others to take away the sting and pain we go through. If you have a joke that's racy then give a heads up at the beginning of your post for those who might not want to read your post. We need to avoid that kind of humor. Please don't come on this thread and berate anyone for their choices of humor. This is our place to let go of criticism. Thanks for sharing!!!! ;o)
Why do we consider chickens as friendly animals?
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Because they lay their eggs instead of throwing them.
He worked his problem out with a number two pencil.
The dentist says "Well make up your mind I gotta adjust the chair!"
Man to wife: "What did she say?"
Wife to husband: "They want your underwear."
"Two beers please, and one for the road."
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Milk is the fastest liquid on earth.
Its pasteurised before you know it.
You'll have to use the stairs... one step at a time.
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A dad is washing the car with his son.
After a moment, the son asks his father, "Do you think we could use a sponge instead?"
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The recipe said "Set the oven to 180 degrees" so I did, but now I can't open it because the door faces the wall.
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Everything always ends well. If not – it's probably not the end.
It was toad!
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A cop just knocked on my door and told me that my dogs were chasing people on bikes. My dogs don't even own bikes...
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The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue.
Then I'm gonna put pins into all the locations that I've travelled to.
But first, I'm gonna have to travel to the top two corners of the map so it won't fall down.
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Ageing gracefully is like the nice way of saying you're slowly looking worse.
She still isn't talking to me.
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I saw an ad for burial plots, and thought to myself this is the last thing I need.
Bacon will kill you...
But,smoking bacon will cure it.
you put whitewash in my eye
I'm a big girl, I won't cry
but I'm sure glad that cows don't fly
Be happy that dogs can't fly.
They forgot to mention Morons.
What do mathematicians do when they get stuck?
They work it out with a pencil. If they get *really* stuck, they work it out with logs.