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jlttks.... we have dogs, one sleeps with her every night to keep strangers away...she is more afraid of falls than her doc.

Maybe I will give one of those soothing sounds machines a try... she's cuddling my oldest dog (18) in her chair now... I'm gonna be super uber quiet. Lack of sleep makes everything that much worse. sigh
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I could literally whine for hours on here as I am sure you all could. I had posted before that my sister (evil) decided to hire a person to come over for 2 hours 3xweek. I really thought she was starting to get it and I know its for mom but I kinda thought it was to help me leave this house! Apparently I misunderstood her. I was telling her that someone from Resource caregivers came over yesterday for ME and she said that mom is to have nothing to do with her and that I have to talk in the living room so mom cannot hear. Well of course I am. however she also made a comment about me getting some support to a mutual friend. Oh well, at least she is helping mom and really is helping me. So I am grateful.
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I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder which is so out of control its scary. I take xanax every day and soma to calm down it may work for a short while but this is the worst it has ever been. I am going to call my doctor and see if there is something more that can help me. I am getting scared about the fact that I think that my mother is going to outlive me. If the anxiety was under control would be such a better caregive to mom. Distraught and scared.
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I was having a good day until my dads AL called stating dad was all confused he thinks he just got out of service (Korean War) etc. I spoke briefly with him and then drove over there. Didnt know why he was living where he is said his money perhaps air force salary wasn't enough to live on etc. Briefly talked about his money and asked if he wants to see bank statements then distracted him by asking to go to his room. said doesn't like living here I distracted again by asking if he wanted to go in courtyard which then the activites director went out and said they were doing some singing. So we sat down next hour or so and he placed maracas did a little singing and calmed him down. Whew!
Spoke later to director who said they wonder and will do dip test tomorrow on urine for a UTI as they said he his going to bathroom a lot. And he gained 10# since moving in last month not counting the 10# he added this spring! So they will watch his food intake and I am going to buy some larger pants. Maybe a full moon event? Will see him tomorrow as I forget to check the length of pants he needs. Hoping today's issues won't resurface.
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fligirl58 ,
dont feel alone .elder care is in no way comparable to child care . only a few months before my mothers death i was so stressed and miserable that it was affecting the atmosphere in the home . were not born knowing about dementia , bipolar , schitzo disorder , end of life care , etc . empathy makes up the difference . imagine you were the one who had worked hard their entire life , had a nice home and a few bucks in reserve , then it all meant nothing because of a medical diagnosis of months to live . as a loving carer all you can do is make those few months as enjoyable as possible . just f in do it is what im sayin .. its the most important calling in your life and youll emerge better for having done it . if the zanax are causing more trouble than theyre worth , send them to me . ive been chomping then down since my wood cutting days in the great sahara forest -- we all know how that turned out ..
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You know what they say about prescription Drugs....Share, Share, That's Fair!

(disclaimer: This is a joke, don't make me give an ER ;))
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Forgot to add to my post. So when I was leaving my dad's AL my sis called so I was updating her on today. Remember his place is about 3.5 miles from me. Anyhow there was a SUV tailgating me vehicle was really close. Due to a speeding ticket I obey the speed limit though many do not. I was not about to speed up so I tapped my brakes this person could really rear ended me. Granted probably not happy I was not phone the person probably though I was a teenager due to my type of vehicle. Anyhow the person passed me going about 40 mph in the 35 mph zone. About 30 seconds after passing the SUV came to a complete stop then pulled off the road and got behind me again. Still taking with my sis :) speed limit does increase 45 to 55 mph ad I have driven this road daily since 1987! Was concerned so the next road I turned off to see if person was going to continue to follow. Just blew there horn do not know if it was about me being on the phone or not driving fast enough or because my vision is not the best until surgery was I erratic driving? Was tempted to pull over and see if this person would have done the same but not worth it in the
end.
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Sorry about typos.
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I think they just don't wipe themselves very well.
when I help mom into the shower, lord she stinks.
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57twin, I know exactly what you mean about those tailgaters. One time I was going through a residential area where the speed limit was 25.... I go 25... and the driver behind me was having a hissy fit, so what I did was pull over like I as going to park at the curb.... let hissy driver have her way and she flew past me.... ah ha, couple miles down the road I saw her handing over her driver's license to a police officer who caught her in his speed trap.... that really made my day... I smiled as I drove past.

One thing I have noticed, it depends on which vehicle I use as to whether I get tailgated. If I use my significant other's big old Jeep which has towing hooks on the back, rarely does anyone tailgate me :P
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My car is a Ford Fiesta. I call it my baby car:)
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57, Did it come with those newly slim and trim rats? They are rats aren't they?
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Sorry, that was wrong. They're hampsters and it was the Kia Soul with the rappin rats.

Soooo sleep deprived and no, mom still hasn't went down for the count. I think her lack of sleep has made the hallucinations that much worse. It started last night with the crying...no crying today just talking about people outside that aren't there and something about what she has to do.... it's like she's planning her death. ALSO. Normally she asks about my brothers visiting her or lack thereof. She's not mentioned them ONE SINGLE time since oldest bro brought her home 7 weeks ago. She's forgot I get so whiny and sniffly when I haven't slept. Everything is tenfold of awful.

My eyeballs hurt.... from reading some of the awful things a poster said on this thread today.
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Well I missed all the drama..LOL But I just discovered my private messages area!! Yeah for me.. but sorry if I hurt anyone by not responding. And I still have not figured out how to do that,, so any advice?
Had to laugh/snort about the podiatrist post. dad's called today to see if we could come early, they had cancellations. Well.. hurry is not in Dads vocab.. but we upped the visit to 11 from 1130.. and sat, and sat,, until 1145! really?? But we did find out mediwhatever will pay for one pair of special shoes for him every year because of his diabetes! So WINNER!! Going to get the fitting and all next visit.
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Hope you can get some sleep soon Jeanette!
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57twin my first car was a ford fiesta my best car ever! Blue bought it for 2,500 sold it for 3000!! great car!
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Jeanette, I so hope both you and your Mom get sleep tonight. Sleep deprivation makes everything so much worse. Keep doing what you are doing with the music and the dog to comfort her. If you have another night like last, you might want to call the Dr. in the morning. This can't go on.I will keep you both in my prayers.
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the stress of taking care of my mom and brother have finally gotten to me. today I was diagnosed with afib and now have to go through a battery of tests. Finally took a day off from this craziness went out with some friends for a few hours. Results...passed out with my pulse rate going crazy.
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Was going to whine but maybe I should celebrate. The current unrest in St Louis is driving hubby into a ranting rage. He says he can't stay here anymore and wants to leave the country. Maybe I should say what I used to say to my youngest when she threatened to run away "Would you like me to help you pack?" I also offered to dial the number for the child abuse hot line too!!!!!!!!!!!
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IDK Kazz, I've gotten hugs before. Oh well I except ur hugs anyway.lol
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Sallie your profile dosnt allow for hugs OR messages?? strange?
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Profiles at times lie. Truth is in the WORDS/ACTIONS.
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barbara51, Are you going to be okay? That is really scary -- much more than a whine. I am glad that you were with people who could make sure you got help.
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Sleep well all you kind/loving caregivers..even those who think they are not as nice as they should be. Tomorrow is another day to try try again... my philosophy anyway.
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Veronica, if my mom said we needed to get out of the country, you bet you buns i'd have this place packed and on the road within the hour!! LOL!! Add all the civil unrest you're having there... I'd go somewhere for an extended vacay!

Barbara51, I hope you are feeling better and you get this thoroughly checked out. This is a stressful heart tugging life we are living right now.

Mom had a slightly better night. I checked on her before I went to bed and she was sound asleep. When I checked on her at 4:00 A.M., she'd apparently been up for awhile. All of the clothes in her closet were on the floor along with her comforter. Guess who was curled up in it all? Yup, mom. I don't think she fell I think she just laid down and went to sleep? I woke her up, helped her to the restroom and back to bed. She was up by 7:00 and now is sound asleep in her chair. She needs the rest so perhaps I will just let her be for awhile.

Seem like things are progressing rather quickly lately. Her speech is just jumbles (most of the time) her appetite is half of what it was so she's losing weight. She is a lot weaker than she was 3 months ago.

I am not ready for all of this.

She did make a funny jab the other day. She was really cranky and the young man who helps us outside was trying to laugh her into a better mood ( she really likes this young man) he told her to "knock it off" (meaning her crankies) mom replied "Knock what off? Your head or your ass"? ROFLMO!! We all laughed, even mom!
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veronica91... there really is no place to run anymore..

two cents ¢¢
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barbara51, as scary as it is regarding one's heart, it is treatable :) Year ago I was rushed to my doctor's office as my heart had this strange fluttering, I use to ignore it because the flutter would go away in a few seconds.... then one day it didn't go away and scared the daylights out of me. I was put on meds and that solved the problem for me.

Find a really good Cardiologist, one that you feel comfortable with and is easy to talk to, that makes all the difference in the world. One who doesn't put you into a panic every time you see him or her.
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Veronica91, my significant other said the same thing the other day. He's also ready to move out of the country.... but that won't happen in his life time, I can't get him to clean out the basement, much less whan to pack anything :P
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I absolutely agree there is no place to run. I did suggest the Falkland Islands but that did not go over too well. He was all for Chile a few months ago but that is no longer in favor. Like your SO hubby can't even pack a suitcase for a week end away. When he was working he travelled a lot and it was an absolute nightmare getting him to the airport after a week of deciding what to pack. Even a short trip needs an hour with the GPS. Right now he is trying to drum up similar symtoms to mine having finally acknowledged I really do have stuff wrong with me and that at 75 there really is no point in showing me ads for jobs in the paper. He is off to the Y this afternoon second time in about five years even though the gear is sorted by me on a regular basis.he has surgery on the OA in his wrist in a couple of weeks so that will be the end of that. Of course there will be the PT but i know he won't do any of the exercises at home. Oh well another day - suck it up, this wasn't the whine thread sorry
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Years ago I put sliding glass shower doors on the bathtub, thought the doors would look nice and they looked great.... didn't have much problem with cleaning the tub and reaching here and there. OMG now that I am older, I hate those doors as it was so much easier to push a shower curtain over to one side and be able to clean the whole tub without trying to bend like a pretzel around the doors :P
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