I'm tired of cooking/preparing 3 meals a day. It's just the two of us but boy oh boy can that woman eat!! She stays slimish, I get fattish. It's bad enough I do everything here much less start making her one thing and me the other. At times I feel guilty when I buy her fast food cuz of the nutritional value....not to mention I eat it too.
BoniChak...I've thought about trying that too...but must admit I'm glad I didn't do it this particular time...haha blue eyebrows might be a little hard to explain....
As the season slowly changes from summer to fall and eventually winter, I have noticed that personalities are changing, Including mine. I dread winter... personally I become quieter and more subdued. Could be a culmination of being locked up for months and seeing mom decline... either way it sucks. Spring, Winter and Fall... love it.
One last thing. GO SEAHAWKS!!
i always smile about this thread , it brings back a couple of fun memories . when i was in the army i had a friend from florida . we lovingly called him " neck " . ( redneck ) . he was forever trying to defend someones honor . he wanted to know WHY ( does she have to be a b*tch , etc ) , except he always pronounced WHY as WHAA . our immediate group of young soldiers would always bust into a chorus of crying like babys . its hard to do when your laughing your a** off at the same time . fifteen years later a coworker from kentucky , at the factory, would do the same . WHAAA .. the group of mechanics i hung with would accomodate him in the same way -- a desperate chorus of loud baby crying . once again , thru the laughter .
i learned a good life lesson from the kentucky gentleman . when a machine would break down id put it in a higher gear and handmake the required part in the same amount of time that KY would spend crying about parts aquisition , management , etc .
i dont have a WHAA today . still have an ear infection but ill see the martinsville va satellite clinic tomorrow and get it looked at .
I'd tell ya whaa the plates jumped up... but their might be some... some ... errr
Obummer.... I can't say why :) as I do not want to offend others...Obummer... hard being nice :)
the cost bugs me because this economy is not going to move until we have some disposable income . stone porches / landscaping isnt in the current american budget ..
bummer on whomevers part ..
I need to find an interesting/enteraining/time consuming HOBBY!!
Mom seems to be getting back to the way she was before she went away for a long weekend. Change in daily activities IS NOT a good idea takes much to much out of mom and hard to get her back into her reality as she feels comfortable. Now if I could just get her to eat a bit more. So far feeding her small portions many times a day seems to be working on building her appetite back up... that and 2 ensures a day :)
Hope everyone has a fabulous weekend!!
I must have missed the memo in regards that this thread was taboo to post on ? Which is fine, I will still post on it and elsewhere if I have something worthy to offer. I am still learning everyday myself.
This thread was just to be a fun thread.. we all have whines and challenging moments. Such is life.
Again, enjoy your weekend!!
I ordered her a "electric" bed (we don't use the word "hospital").She fought me a little, but liked the fact that she can push a button to sit up, as getting out of bed is getting harder. In making my case, I stumbled across some magic words.
"In all honesty Mom, It would sure make things easier on me and my back".
She got a huge smile and said "Of Course we'll get it. If it makes your life easier than it makes me happy."
It was like I gave her the gift of doing something for ME, because of all I do for her. It was good to learn a new way to make her happy. I will certainly use those words again.
I wish you all the satisfaction and appreciation that I get from care giving. I NOT saying it's easy, But every time I come here, I realize how much better I have it than most. I'm feeling quite blessed and content, and I'm praying for the same for all of you.
we copped my mom an electric recliner a few months before her death . it not only gave her many comfort options but with late dementia , it kept her entertained / distracted , playing with the hardwired remote . bout 600 bucks -- much better deal than pressure sores from the junk she was sitting in .
Did you order it from Hospice Bon? Nice that your other still understands how nice it is to make things easier on you. How rewarding it must have felt for you to hear those precious words from your mother.
Hmmm... I would like to find some of those magic words. Actually, I'd love it mom would actually SIT for more than 5 minutes them up again wandering and can't find her chair. Chair? What chair? That chair, you know, your chair. Where? Right there. Right where? THERE!! ( 1 foot from her backside) sigh
An epiphany struck me today... I joined this website about 2.5 years ago. The first six or so months I was still living in Florida just doing some research.... by the time I finally got here with my parent's I had forgot my screen name and or password...something to that fact but I re-joined. Ahh regressing.... SO, my epiphany was.... In the year plus I've been here, our loved ones are regressing further, times passes in a haze at times and well . here we are
So, I'm thinking of taking up either knitting or crocheting. I vote knitting as it might be easier for me to see. Something to do with my hands aside from using them as feeding tools!!! Speaking of food, mom must like my homemade spaghetti sauce from the garden tomatoe's n onions... all I hear is slurrrppp :D
She woke up around 2:00 p.m., went to the restroom/with assistance finding it, ate half a bowl of chicken soup and a slice of toast with jam. Has been sound asleep ever since. 3.5 hours to be exact.
Her not sleeping at night wouldn't be a worry to me if she knew where things were. She no longer knows where her room is, her chair, bathroom... basically anything. In the past 6 months she's went from taking walks to shuffling and scared to take too many steps. Guess it makes me feel so bad for her thinking she's up wandering the house, cold not knowing where she is. Sigh.
Making her another appt tomorrow to see if the UTI has cleared or if her meds could be causing her to sleep so much the past few days.
From what I've read on the AD webpage... she's been in stage 6 for some time now and the past month moving towards 7.
I don't know what's worse, her constantly moving/scared and crying or sleeping all day. I keep checking her chest to see if it's rising... I'm just talking/typing to keep myself from freaking myself out too much!!
I'm doubling up Bob. Had a very long talk with myself while watching mom sleep. Things weren't always easy for her with my dad...least I can do is make this as easy as possible. My awesome help/caretaker, Lisa, called to check on me today... she's been in this biz for 20 years and actually ran an AD home in Fresno, moved here to help her daughter. She offered to sit with mom while I start a support group... one for mom and one for grief since I apparently haven't got over my father dying. What a lovely, lovely, kind caring woman. Blessed to have found her or her us.
Mom was up for maybe 2 hours, ate 5 more bites of soup and drank an entire ensure plus half a glass of water. WHEW! Took her to the restroom and she asked to just go to bed. Said her legs were tired. Her bed is on HIGH so she'll be nice and comfy. Daphne (my dog her protector) is curled up beside her. Seriously, I just pray I don't have a breakdown. It's hard to tuffen up doing this on your own for the most part ya know :)
ff ... I was SO SAD losing Joan Rivers!! Mom and I watched a lot of her stuff on youtube tonight including the Roast they did for her about 5 years ago. Of course I laughed my a** off and mom kept asking me if this was real? Could they really cuss like that? Who where those people? Finally turned it to the Disney movie Ice Age. She seems to enjoy that show.
After a good 18 hours of sleep, she doesn't seem as upset and fearful. Still confused just not as scared.. That is a great thing :)
Sleep well!!
I know I knew zero about old age, until my parents started to have age decline... my late grandparents lived many States away so I always remembered them as being in their 60's.... and it was only last year I found this website... what an eye opener !!
honeycomb, I am in the same boat as you, I never had children, and I have no siblings thus there are no nieces or nephews, so there won't be anyone to take care of me if my sig other passes before I do :(
I loved how Joan could poke fun at herself... I remember on time her saying about having a hot flash that was so bad that her dress caught on fire :P
As for support groups, they are so hard to find... there seems to be support groups for all types of medical issues, but for Caregiving, can't find anything close enough. I keep thinking maybe because it is difficult for a Caregiver to get away to attend these groups.
Well the service has now set a minimum limit of $60 for groceries... in the past there was no limit, but I can understand them doing that.... but if one is shopping for elderly parents once a week, not every week they get $60 worth of groceries... wish the on-line services would take that into consideration.
Maybe I will fire off an email asking if they can take senior citizens into consideration and maybe set a minimum at $40.
once when i took my mom " shopping " we were standing in the checkout and she was bumping the forward button on her old fart cart , in essence rocking the machine . it puzzled me . i was thinking this is the sort of annoying thing she would have backhanded me for when i was a kid. as months passed i began to see all kinds of strange behavior. i haveta admit before she was diagnosed with dementia there were times i wanted to strangle her. i do understand how you cant deal with the shopping trips. our parents came from a generation of poverty and war. as postwar society evolved into a manufacturing / consumer model they embraced and found comfort in routine. im more 60 ' - 70 ' s counterculture and too much structure makes me want to climb the bell tower with a 50 cal .. i tried to buy ear wax softening drops at a drugstore today and they had a special deal ; buy one at a special inflated price , get 3 bucks off your next purchase -- except the tag implied the purchase was marked down to three bucks . our parents would have had a ball playing such a childish game . i told the cashier " im not here to play " and fortunately she understood .. my dad was the kind who would spend 75 cents to wash his car with 3 kids in the back seat dying for an ice cream cone . the church got 40 bucks a week tithe money while we literally went hungry. we ARE NOT our parents thankfully ..
More of a bit of a mixed day, then.
Pee not such a worry - a good mop and any standard disinfectant will see it off a hard floor. For carpets try something they sell for pet 'accidents', maybe? The hallway bowel movement, oh brother. I was scrubbing the same off my mother's bedroom carpet in the wee small hours of Sunday morning - I used probably over strength Zoflora disinfectant and my own tears, then rinsed and rinsed and blotted and blotted and redisinfected, then left the window open and the heater on and so far so good - no returning stain or odour. But God willing you won't need to know that.
Continence issues can test the mettle, can they not? It's safety that's proving the deal-breaker for me, but toileting accidents surely do break the spirit.
I must have missed the memo about not posting here.
My whine today is because I proved to myself I was a demented old lady.
Hubby had surgery yesterday, nothing much but we had to get up at 4 am and did not get home till 5-30 pm. I was given a voucher for free coffee in the cafetera and was surrounded by with all these efficient people in white coats and scrubs quickly picking up the coffee and snacks whisking round me. First I could not find anything in the food line then I needed cutlery and could not work the vending machine that dispenses it. After that I finally worked out that you turned the bagel splitter upside down to cut the bagel, no knife involved. Ah and the toaster,it had two levels so I tried first one then the other but where was the switch to make it work. Finally as I was gazing at my two halves of ragged bagel sitting in the top of the toaster I noticed they had dissappeared only to be thrown out of the bottom a few seconds later. I managed to make it to the check out thankful I had a voucher as I was shaking too badly to have produced cash. As I sat and ate I noticed other senior citizen walking round and round in a daze fearful of actually approaching the guts of the food chain so I felt a little better.
No a Whine but the goewns for the patients have become like space suites. everything off, even if you are only haveing your nails cut aand put on this thick disposeable thing that looks like a space suit but the good side is that it does not leave your backside exposed for all to see, There are many pockets and slits in the thing including a port for a hose that pumps in warm air to keep you comfortable. How times change mostly overnight.
There was a woman in the waiting room at least 20 years younger than me and a lot physically fitter than me who kept complaining how tired she was and asking how much longer she had to wait because she had to get up at 4am to get there. I was very proud of myself for not opening my mouth!!!!!! Patient is sleeping the day away on his opiods not suffering at all.
if one goes to a va er you will be parting with your clothes as a first step . i suspect this makes a person rather vulnerable --less likely to bluff staff or walk out on a procedure / visit .
linda, i wont walk in a kroger store . every purchase is some kind of game to detract from the fact that your being ripped off . then ther'lle be overcharges at the checkout that are deliberately too troublesome to challenge -- the checkout receipt deliberately garbled . they might think people are idiots but big chains fail all the time because the public rebels .
i thought this comical . i never try to chisel someones price but i wanted to get my aunt an arbys sandwich a couple weeks ago . there was no special deal available so a basic roast beef was 3.29 ea . i told the girl id take one for my aunt but wouldnt pay that price on my own behalf , forget the other two . damm if she didnt offer me 3 of em for 5 bucks .. i weigh every purchase against what my mom would think , which quite often was ( i aintta payin it and let em keep it " .