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You read my mind. I'm new to this forum and decided to sign up because you shared a feeling that I find most people don't understand unless they've been a caregiver themselves. My mom has Parkinson's and dementia and requires full care. I live one and a half hours away and despite having two brothers who live closer, the bulk of the day to day issues, personal support worker concerns and regular social visits fall to me. After six years of this, (and I do love my mom) to say I'm exhausted is an understatement! For me, its not any big crisis that is so tiring its the day to day drudgery, the tiny details that are vital to my mom's care but are SO time consuming. Its the waking up everyday knowing that my mom will call and have one of three conversations...that she's lonely and her family never visits or calls, that everyone from her past has hurt or taken advantage of her, or that she needs to get ready for christmas (yes even in january). I feel like I'm in that movie Groundhog Day. I work in the health care field and I need to be present and have a smile on my face for my clients. So at the end of the day I feel so physically, emotionally and mentally depleted that I don't have it in me to socialize. I'm so demotivated that I can't seem to maintain an exercise plan. And join a social group? Not a chance! It's just one more commitment...one more demand on my time. I know I'm just going through a rough patch and I will find something which renews my energy but at the moment, I sure feel battle weary.

In difficult times like this,I recall my father's words of wisdom..."Like a large and uncomfortable kidney stone...this too shall pass!"
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I reached this point this weekend. Had to move mom and ended up doing it almost completely by myself. I used every mental and emotional and physical reserve I had. When my sister got all emotional about the way something was said to her and her husband starting asking all about this move (which I'd been telling them about for weeks), I snapped. I had nothing left for any of them.
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All the time! My head is tired from constant worry and guilt.. I dreaded Easter which was having my own grown kids come over (now that's bad) but I had a good day! It's more the thought of doing something than doing it. Once I get out I'm fine, sometimes it seems like it's not worth going or doing BUT I know I need to socialize with others as much as possible..

I do avoid people who bring me down! Or dump their non important problems on me, I have enough on my plate now I can't deal with their bulls**t.. I try not to speak about my Mom when I'm out unless it's my bff and she's heard it all..
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