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One of the problems I see among my own family is that we stink at talking to each other. One person might be perceived as "too busy" and maybe gets left-out of discussions. Or, maybe that person acts that way and brushes others off, leaving the others to believe it's not worth the trouble to tell that person anything.

My own outside observation is this: things that you don't know about seem "secretive." I hear one side say they did something that sounds quite reasonable to me but their sibling or other relative doesn't hear about it in a timely manner and then attributes a "secret" reason to what that person has done.

As such, I can't blame either side in this issue. I can kind of see both sides of this story in my own family. Just to be honest about this, my own family has these problems: we mean well but can't communicate that, properly; we're suspicious of each other and, when we don't know all the facts, immediately get into conspiracy theories; we've never had an opinion we've felt can't be immediately shared in the most blunt fashion, meaning that there are plenty of relatives who will never again speak to plenty of other relatives. It's easy to say this, sitting on the sidelines, but hard to do any better for my own situation. I'm not saying this to pretend to be any better, am admitting I'm not, just saying we should all be just a bit sympathetic to both sides in this thing.
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I have no sympathy for anyone, especially some clueless sib that suddenly realizes that they need a roof, doesn't come back to help the parent but comes back because THEY need something from the parent, moves back in to mom's house, upsetting the status quo, takes none of the blame for issues, points fingers and blames everyone else and bullies they're way into the situation and completely takes it over, clueless to what's necessary and needed, then causes a family member to head for the hills, depriving the elderly parent of that comfort and feels some PAID stranger is the better alternative. I smell a rat.

And nobody calls the damn cops on another because of some TV channel or because they're 'selfish'. Really? Bet there was a whole lot to it than that.
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