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Have you ever been in this situation? I feel like I'm going to burst into angry tears!


Stepmom has a doc's appointment early on Friday morning, in suite 201. She cannot remember suite 201, even if I write it down. She cannot push the right button anyway. So she cannot go by herself and my dad is 100% likely to be too confused to get her into the right building, across the foyer and able to press button #2. So I HAVE to take time off work to go.


They are financially indigent, so the county provides wheelchair transport since she can no longer sit in any type of vehicle. The county's agent said yesterday that I had to register to even GET this help. They registered me. It took about 45 minutes with repetitive questions that I've already entered into their record with the county. With the same person. OMG! Now it needs to be in a new system?!?! WTH! She told me to wait 1-2 hours to populate her name on the transport co's list and then call them to schedule. I waited 24 hours, because I actually have a life.


Just now, I called the transport company. The woman spent 10 minutes taking down the exact same details. Then she said, "Oh, we can't take her to that doctor's office (which is less than two blocks from the other one) because that address isn't on the approval list (although it IS on the grounds of the big local hospital!!!) You have to call the county back and request that this office's address be added to the list, then give it 1-2 hours..." Meanwhile, I HAVE A LIFE!


How do you handle this? Not the emotion. I realize that I'm just screwed on that one until they're all dead. I mean this: "What do I do about transport, so that I NEVER have to deal with this ever again? (Meanwhile, I want to scream!!!)


Thanks in advance.


PS: For those of you who keep on telling me to put them in assisted living, please refrain entirely from responding to this question. I'm quite clear on your perspective! It is of no help to keep telling me the same thing, because there's a lot more paperwork to be done before the state will place them. Thank you anyway.

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My mother refused to go to the doctors. If I took her there, she would not get out of the car. However, she would tolerate nurses who came to the house to check on her. I got a couple of referrals for doctors who make house calls which I will contact soon. Having a doctor come to house works better for us. The doctor can order labs to come to the house to take blood and urine. Last time, a nurse came to administer IV for her antibiotics. Almost everything can be done in the home setting. No need to transport her anywhere unless it's ER.

I also let go of all her specialists for heart and kidneys, etc. The current doctor could prescribe all the necessary meds including those from the specialists, so there was no need to go to them. Last year, her doctor reviewed all her meds and reduced them to just the necessary ones which were those for her heart and blood pressure. No more Alz. meds and a bunch of other ones that didn't make diddly squat of a difference from what I observed.
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What I've done is hire a private ambulance transport company, as my Mom is 100% bedridden. It costs $95 each way in a wheelchair, or $150 each way in a stretcher.
It's a financial hardship on us, but it's the only way I was able to get her home from her last E.R. visit.

The private companies respond quickly, and there is no hassle or application.

Because of this expense, I was able to find a Physician's Office that makes Home Visits for less than the cost of transportation to her previous Doctor's office.

(Her former Doctor had been seeing her on my phone in Telehealth video chat, but her Doctor stopped doing that and stated she wanted her patients to visit in person.
So we changed Doctors.)

See if their Doctors will do Video Visits on the phone.
It's so much simpler.
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Send a cab to their home. Pay the driver extra to walk them into the building and deliver them to the correct address.

Get on the phone with the doc during the appointment.

Why didn't she go to rehab after this surgery?

Is there any possibikity she can still be admitted to rehab?

Make sure the doc understandsbthat they live alone
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Hire someone to drive them to and from appointments and accompany them all the way to the waiting room. I have a 78-year-old cousin who has what he calls his two "old ladies" who employ him for this very purpose.

Since you don't want the obvious answer, I'd suggest you learn to deal with your emotions and the frustrations that go with dealing with inefficient governmental agencies. No one ever said they loved dealing with the government, but you'll catch more flies with honey than vinegar, so try to resist the urge to yell at the people who are just trying to do their jobs in those inefficient bureaucracies.
We all deal with inefficient governmental agencies in many facets of our lives.

The point is, we all have lives, and we all have to deal with inefficient bureaucracies. It is what it is, so either learn how to deal with it, burst into angry tears, or figure out a long term plan to handle your parents' medical needs, because I guarantee you they won't lessen from this point on but will rather increase.
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