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If so, did getting a PO help improve the situation or did it make things worse?

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In civil matters, obtaining a Protective Order/Restraining Order is very costly and not always a swift process. The best person to consult is with an attorney who is also well versed in elder law/litigation. Usually attorneys offer a free 15-20 minute consultation. From there you can obtain additional information we wouldn't be able to counsel you on.

If you need to call the police, do so. The more these incidents are documented, the better it is for you build a case against sibling.

It's been my experience, if the relative is vindictive, they'll keep trying any way to disrupt your life.

Keep documentation of everything and consult with an attorney what your best course of action will be.
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NeedHelpWithMom Aug 2023
Totally agree with you on documenting everything! That is how my daughter got her restraining order against her boyfriend in college. She had proof of his unstable behavior.

He started off being a very charming guy. Not uncommon for these types of abusers, initially they can be quite deceptive.

When she broke up with him he became violent with her and her dog.

Plus, he wrote a note to her that he dropped off at her work, saying that he was going to kill her and himself. Her attorney presented it all in court along with witnesses.

When she read the note, she contacted his father who happens to be a detective. They tracked him down through his cell and was brought to a mental hospital.
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I think the PO means restraining order.

Like said, a restraining order is a tool. Lets say it says sibling can't come within 100 yards of you, Mom and your home. But he/she does. The restraining order allows you to call the police to remove him/her. And because they went against the oder they are fined or put into jail. It does not protect you if they break into your home. You just hope u can get to a phone to call the police. I would have cameras installed around my house.

If the sibling is deranged, of coursing getting one might make them worse.
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AlvaDeer Aug 2023
Ah, thanks. A restraining order.
As we can't know the sibling we can know little about him or her obeying a restraining order.
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PO is a protective order, aka, a restraining order.

POA is a power of attorney.

This is for a sibling?
Are you sure that it is needed, or can you ignore and avoid her?
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You don't "get a POA". A POA is given to you or requested of you by the senior who wishes you to act for him or her. If you have a troubled or troublesome sibling and you are the power of attorney for your Mom or your Dad then it may be the BEGINNING of your woes. First of all there are many duties of the POA and it has a high legal fiduciary responsibility. You will be acting for your loved one and adding you name with many entities. It takes tremendous time and trouble and record keeping must account for EVERY SINGLE PENNY in and out of the senior's accounts. That means that a sibling who doesn't trust you can go to an attorney and accuse you of fraud and elder abuse and demand a full accounting before the courts at any time. Doesn't sound like fun, does it?

Are you being threatened with violence?
Can you give us more details so that you may get better answers how to proceed?

For to, and to my mind, warring siblings is the worst thing for a senior to have to deal with when fragile and approaching end of life. It is a cruel thing, awful to see. I hope that you will find a way toward peace and reconciliation, but not knowing details cannot guess if that is even possible with mediation.
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AlvaDeer Aug 2023
Sorry, OP. I thought PO mean Power of Attorney and you meant a restraining order as in order of protection as I was corrected above.

I think not knowing your sibling we cannot know if a restraining order would make him/her better/worse. Some people operate within the confines of the law, some don't.
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I’m not going to pry into your personal business. You don’t have to share anything with the forum that you don’t wish to.

I am guessing that in the past you have experienced extremely difficult times with your sibling. I am very sorry that there wasn’t harmony in your family.

Getting a protective order isn’t easy. You must provide adequate proof. My youngest daughter had to acquire one against her abusive ex boyfriend. She had a great lawyer and was able to provide sufficient evidence of him being a threat.

My daughter had some piece of mind afterwards but she was well aware that it was only a tool to help protect her.

Sometimes irrational people don’t follow laws even if they will pay a consequence for breaking the restrictions that are set in place.

If you feel that a restraining order will help your situation, by all means start the process to obtain one.

Best wishes to you and your family.
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