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To those that "care," MIL was brought home on hospice and they do not expect her to live much longer.

Bandy, I have enough on my plate so please do not comment. I do not want to be upset by an anonymous person on the Internet.
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PeggySue2020 Oct 2022
Is this your home?
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Bandy, can you just leave my posts alone? I have asked repeatedly.
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The OP has reported that the Medicaid Caseworker would not approve transfer of the patient to a Nursing home. The caseworker seems to be some sort of gatekeeper.

Look, getting an elderly, not so cooperative indigent patient decent care IS rocket science, especially if you don't have friends, family and colleagues who've been down the path before.

In my case, I have friends who are nurses, social workers and geriatrics M.D.s. We had good doctors, stellar discharge planners AND mom was private paying, so no Medicaid snafus. I have 2 cooperative loving brothers AND a brilliant MBA sister in law who managed my mom's money.

AND I still ended up in tears at least once a week, on the phone, at work, trying to manage mom's meds, PT, dental and audiology appointments and other 'little things'. No one was asking me to show up to give insulin shots or clean bedsores.

This is a tough system to navigate for anybody. Have some compassion. And please remember that the OP has not a shred of say-so in any of this. It's her DH who is the POA and he doesn't listen.
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Isthisrealyreal Oct 2022
Amen.

I think we forget how traumatizing this whole aging care can be.
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Read your update. Glad to see siblings are stepping up to the plate. Sorry the Hospice needs to be at your house though. Hope you can find a way to be alone and rejuvenate. Take advantage of the time you are away at therapy. Get in the car and drive to a park. Find ways to be alone. Do not feel guilty about the siblings doing what they should have been doing, advocating for their mother.

When all is said and done, try to get away by yourself. Even if its a weekend in a hotel. Pamper yourself. Make decisions where u life is going to go. What u will put up with, and what you won't.

I hope some of us have helped you. Take a break from us if you need to. But please update us on how your doing. We love updates.
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