My MIL lives in her own home on her own. She is 89 and dealing with some cognitive decline. She frequently crawls due to back issues. She is not falling as far as we can tell. My husband took a picture and sent it to me and my sister-in-law. I am a teacher and therefore a mandated reporter. I don't think this is ok. My sister-in-law, who is the medical POA, thinks it's ok due to it not being a result of a fall, but instead because of back issues. She is really entrenched. If we do anything, there is a strong likelihood that the relationship will be damaged beyond repair. She does a lot for her mom. She is the primary caregiver.
So, is it ever ok to let the elderly crawl?
I don't think a nursing home would be able to solve the issue. Maybe a pain management place has a solution for MIL.
But I agree with Burnt Caregiver that the family memembers should all sit down and talk about what is going on with MIL.
Though if SIL is like my mother the talk wont actually go over well and will just create more problems than solutions.
I'm answering your comment from below. My friend I have no faith in humanity. I have faith in my humanity though.
Do what's right for the sake of doing what's right.
Sure, it might piss people off. You might make enemies or lose a job like I did. If you can help a senior with dementia, or a child, or an animal to get out of an unsafe living situation, do it anyway.
Sometimes a person has to put some time in and do some legwork. No one is going to thank you or appreciate any of it. Do it anyway. It's a mitzvah (good deed) which makes a person better and elevates their soul.
I'm not a particularly nice person or even a friendly one. I'll always do right by somebody though. Not just for them but for myself.
At the OP it is okay to turn a blind eye if you are not going to do the leg work, let your MIL be and avoid the added headaches that come with APS being involved. My sample size with APS is small just this forum and another one, but they seem like they are kinda useless in most cases. If one does not do their due diligence and pesters them nothing will get done. I hope you do not expect your SIL to be calling for updates and what have you. As a teacher I doubt you have time, unless you are one of those teachers that just uses teachers pay teachers, to reduce your work load. (Dated a teacher once.)
Either way glad you are willing to piss people off, burn bridges with families, loose jobs etc… most are not. My old man once told me he was a whistle blower that reported a bank for discriminating against POC when it came to mortgages especially in affluent areas.
”Pride does not pay the bills.” Doing good at the expense of oneself personally makes no sense cause end of the day as you said only you really will be the only one to notice and in a sense putting in all that effort so you can sleep well at night or some do to bank chips so the wizard or whatever they believe in the sky views them favorably, or it just boils down to virtue signaling.
Either way if the OP is willing to do the leg work awesome, I am will the SIL would love the break. Though if the OP is just going to call and expect APS to sweep in a address the issue, or expect the SIL to field the phone calls, sudden visits with the case worker, and the doctor if they need a need to do a psych assessment in home. Then honestly, please do not be a busy body and leave well enough alone.
You, being a mandated reporter, think you should report it so someone ELSE can help MIL. How about YOU and your husband take turns to come and stay with MIL to make sure she does not crawl on the floor? Or take her to doctor to get help for her mobility? Too busy to do that? But you think SIL who according to you "does a lot for her mom" should do even more? Any wonder why doing that might result in "the relationship damaged beyond repair" ?
You said "if we do anything... wil! result in relationships damaged...." I seriously doubt your "anything" includes actual hands on help that SIL needs for her mom.
So instead of making an easy phone call to report to someone body, go ask SIL what you and MIL's son can do to help so his mom does not have to crawl on the floor.