Follow
Share
Read More
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
Thanks everyone. Yes, I’m not too concerned over the shared room and feel like it might actually be good for my mom to have a roomie to talk to.
To answer some of your questions, she is sick in that she has vascular dementia and needs to use a walker to walk. She is weak from recovering from pneumonia and they cut off her physical therapy when her 21 Medicare days ran out. But no, she is not so sick that she should be laying in bed in dirty clothes all day. So far she has worn the same clothes for 3 days that I know of. (I live 2 hours away but my SIL is local and visits almost daily).
Apparently the staff is asking her if she wants to change clothes or go to the dining room to eat and she tells them she doesn’t want to. Not in an argumentative way, just like nah, not today.
She has become increasingly lazy and wanting to be waited on hand and foot since being in NH. Narcissism coming out I guess. We have told the staff to tell her she is changing clothes now or going to dining room because it is just not good for her to lay in bed day after day and there is also some depression involved with her attitude. I just feel like it is the staffs responsibility to care for her as with dementia she is unable to make proper decisions for her own care.
I am going to request a meeting with the care team when I go in tomorrow.
It just really seems like the care she is receiving has changed considerably since she moved from the rehab side of the facility to long term care.
Thanks again everyone you guys are true earth angels !
Helpful Answer (7)
Report
rocketjcat Jan 2019
So was she more receptive to changing clothes and getting up in rehab? Or did they just tell her what’s going to happen then do it? She may be “competent” enough to refuse to get up, but I’ll tell you it wouldn’t be tolerated for very long at my Moms without some type of intervention. If the family wants their LO up dressed and at meals etc. and there’s no physical reason not to, then it’s going to happen. These people are trained to convince and cajole and make it happen. And if they can’t, then up the nursing ladder it goes.
Usually when there’s a rehab to NH transfer, a couple of weeks of PT is ordered to get a baseline. So I would try to get her back into a couple of weeks of PT...that will get her bum out of bed.
(6)
Report
On a single note I would not complain about the shared room if the roommate is decent. My grandmother had a terrible one. Hopefully your mother is not experiencing that issue. There can be some difficult issues that arise in that event.
Helpful Answer (8)
Report

You shouldn't have to accept abysmal care whether you are rich or poor, it this place doesn't address your concerns then you might want to find a better facility that also accepts medicaid.
Helpful Answer (9)
Report

NO that is not normal care in a NH, with or without Medicaid. As already posted the staff doesn’t know if a resident is private pay or not...only the accounting department knows. Have you had a care conference with the doctor, nurse and social worker yet? Is she sick? Is your Mom physically able to get up, washed up and dressed with assistance? No one at Moms NH is left in bed unless they are very very ill. Otherwise they are up, dressed and at meals, even if they have to be fed. Are you able to visit her and track down the nurse manager or doctor?

Also, Double rooms are most common...at Moms they keep the couple of private rooms available for sick residents who must be quarantined for some reason, or to give families some privacy near end of life. Try not to get too hung up on the shared room, it’s usually not a bad thing.
Helpful Answer (11)
Report

My mother was in a nursing home, skilled care, for nearly four years. In this time she went from private pay, using her LTC insurance, to Medicaid. There was no difference in her care no matter which way the facility was being paid. The staff didn’t know or care which patients paid which way. My mother was always in a shared room but we never an a roommate issue. She was helped from bed into wheelchair daily, clothing changed, fed, and kept clean. Your mom shouldn’t be in bed unless physically sick. She needs the stimulation of being up and about. Time for a meeting with whoever is in charge. It’s your right to request a care meeting at anytime, you’re her advocate now
Helpful Answer (10)
Report
shad250 Jan 2019
Just because a care meeting is requested does not mean one will happen.
(0)
Report
See 2 more replies
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter