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My father has been in a rehab for 3 weeks, and he was placed in their neurobehavioral unit, due to violent outbursts. I, along with my siblings and his doctors, don't believe this is appropriate for him, and are working on getting him into a memory care unit, where the staff is trained better to help with dementia patients. He was put in this rehab because it was highly rated, but it has been a horrible experience. Due to the wing he is in, his delusions have become so elaborate that he believes the mob is out to kill him and that he is playing a part in a movie. I try not to fight him on what he believes, because I know this is actually what he believes is reality, and I can easily get through to him when I play a part of the delusion. I have convinced him that the memory care facility is his new home where there is heightened security so no one will be able to get to him, and he will be safe when we visit. But I am concerned at how elaborate the delusions are, and if this is just his reality he lives in now. His doctor is working to get the right medications and therapy for him, and because the memory care has areas where he can have his own space (with staff overseeing discretely) and he can go outside freely, which has proven to help his state of mind.


Am I doing the right things to help him? Is there more I need to do?

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It is sometimes very tough to be objective when someone you dearly love needs the kind(s) of help your father needs.

Each of his health condition(s) can cause symptoms like the ones you are observing, and sometimes finding the best treatment plan can be a very tough process.

Are you keeping a log of the behaviors, times of day, and activities he engages in when problems occur? Doing that can be helpful for you and your dad and for his diagnostic staff.

Any residential site must address issues of potential danger towards residents, so his current setting was probably intended to protect him and others. Unless you and your family have training and experience with adults with both cognitive and behavior management issues, you may be thinking in terms of “best for him” rather than “functional within a group with similar complex needs”.

Hopefully, part of his present program includes diagnosis by experts trained in neuropsychiatric disorders of geriatric patients.

Whoever is legally responsible for his care should be given copies of all diagnostic tools used, and all results and treatment recommendations. All of his work ups should be read, and a source for answering questions about his case may need to be found to help all on board understand what’s happening with him.

Bearing in mind that sometimes in complex cases, there will be no perfect solution, work with his professionals to come up with the best treatment plan you can come up with for him.

You and your family will no doubt have some difficult choices. If you are focusing on Dad’s SAFETY, COMFORT, and BEHAVIOR MANAGEMENT, you’ll be on the right track.

Good luck moving forward.
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