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My hubs is 85 and in briefs full time. I've probably tried 20-30 different briefs, but still have leakage. Day time I can try to get him to a bathroom, but night time everything is soaked. He has a hospital bed and I cover with Mainstay sheets, plus a long washable pad running from side-to-side over the mattress and then a shorter pad on top of that, running lengthwise. He sweats like crazy and his briefs leak from the side; often even the sheet is wet. I feel like I'm running a laundry company and it's miserable for him. Any suggestions?

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Uhm, are you sure he's got himself properly tucked inside the brief? Do you think it would be helpful to have him use a bedside commode or urinal at set times through the night? Some caregivers have mentioned using a condom catheter at night, perhaps that might be worth a try.
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I'm glad CW put it so nicely :)

Is the whole pad soaked through and leaking, or are there dry areas but there's still been a leak? - is one way to check this point.

If the whole pad is soaked through, sodden and heavy, and there's still been a leak, and you don't have an option to upgrade to a pad with higher capacity (they usually say how much liquid they can hold on the label somewhere), then I'd get advice on how to manage his intake and output. Capacity goes up to 1500mls or more and that's a heck of a lot of output.

What's the excessive sweating about, has that been investigated?
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Thank you, All, for getting back so quickly. Generally, the whole brief and extra pad is soaked. He is unable to sit up in bed by himself and can't seem to figure out how to make the hospital bed work for him. I've tried getting up at night, but frankly I need to get some sleep, too. When he gets into bed, he has to slide (can't pick up his bumper to move over) and I always check to make sure everything's in place. He's using the highest capacity brief but he also has slender legs with a larger girth, so maybe I should try to use the tape type of undies. I tried them once but couldn't seem to set the tapes in the right spot. Have you had luck hooking the tape style undies on one side, slip it on, pull it up and then hook the other side? Re: excessive sweating: I thought maybe the pads he's sleeping on made him sweat - but then know that the hospital bed and sheet would cause the same problem. We tried the condom catheter in the rehab center last November, but no one could make it stay. He's on meds for urinary problems already. I just know I'm tired. Thanx for your input. I feel a little better just telling someone...
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mguercio May 2019
I was taught by a smart home health aide to roll my husband in order to clean him properly and put on his diapers. It helps if you have a guard rail for him to hold on to while you have him on his side. Repeat the process to the other side. Condom catheters do not work. They slip off, especially for heavy wetters. The hospital bed is not as good as learning to roll him. Always cross his legs at the shins/ankles so he rolls in one long move.
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About the sweating... if I’m following what you wrote correctly, you’re saying that with the regular sheets on the hospital bed he was still sweating?

If that is the case, I wonder about the mattress- does it have any type of synthetic cover on or around it?

My own experience by way of menopause and really awful night sweats - not to mention hot flashes - plus having a disabled son who is in Depends full time and he having gone through his sweaty teenage years - is that any type of plastic or synthetic material around the mattress or in the way of a mattress protector- would cause us both to sweat all the more. Wow. Massive run-on sentence so I hope it made sense. Even if the plastic type material was a layer or two away from the body via a sheet.

I suppose it is the complete inability of these materials that protect the mattress to breath - that causes the excessive sweating.

I was able to find a waterproof mattress protector that solved that problem. These mattress protectors are made with a cotton terry cloth on the front side and Gor-Tex on the back. While Gor-Tex is a synthetic fiber, it is revolutionary in that it allows moisture to pass out but not to penetrate in. Totally took the sportswear industry to a whole new level as Gor-Tex is also very light weight.

I love these mattress protectors so much I have two for every bed in the house. They have never once failed when my son has had an accident at night - which, in spite of him being in a heavy duty overnight Depends - they ALWAYS leak resulting in totally soaked bedding - and the mattress remaining dry.

I found them at a mattress store called Sleep Train in my state - but I believe they go by another name now. If you’re interested you could probably google a couple keywords and get results for where you can buy them. I will warn you - they are pretty expensive- at least in comparison to typical mattress protectors. But worth every penny.

A side benefit - these mattress protectors do not make any of that awful crackling noises that plastic backed protectors make when you move around in bed.

So - sorry about the long post if this is not of any interest to you and the actual issue you asked about. I just had to respond as I know how miserable being a sweaty sleeper can be.

I do have some feedback regarding your actual question and will post it tomorrow. It’s after midnight now and I need to hit my cool and quiet bed.
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Carolyn17 Apr 2019
I also purchased a mattress cover from a mattress store that sounds similar to what you describe here. You are correct in that they almost feel like a soft terry sheet to the skin, but the backing is totally waterproof. I paid close to $100.00 for the one I have, but it has saved the mattress from being soiled many times over. I purchased it after my hubby had his first accident and we haven't had another mattress soiled spots since. it washed well too. It doesn't feel like it would cause sweating and he has never complained about being too hot.
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Here is what I did with my mom . I bought a mattress cover then I bought painters plastic covered the mattress just were my mom slept. Then put on sheet and another piece of plastic just the size of the over night pad . Then put over night pad down . Also my mom wore Depends overnight sometimes she leaked but when she did I threw all the plastic away . Please make him go to the bathroom before he goes to bed that helped a lot too !
Good luck😀
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Hesmyguy Apr 2019
thank you! It's good to consider alternate processes.
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Thank you all again - I haven't seen gore-tex sheets but will research that. As hunters and fishermen, we used gore-tex all the time, so I could see where that might help. I have tried getting him to go to the bathroom prior to bedtime, but he doesn't have that much control and doesn't have the patience to wait 30 minutes or more (neither do, I, I must confess). I have also tried the painter's cloth but that didn't work either. The rehab place didn't have that much luck throughout the night. . I've again tried the tabbed undies, but could not them to stay in place as I latched them. thank you all for your ideas. I have not given up yet - I apologize for the rambling - It's time to try some shut-eye.
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He can't sit up in bed by himself? Then I guess he wouldn't be able to use a portable urinal, huh.

If part of the problem is that you're not able to make the pads/briefs fit comfortably, then I'd see if you can get someone actually to show you. Of course there are loads of videos and how-to's online, but nothing beats a live demonstration on the person you're actually helping. There are such things as specialist continence care nurses; don't know if your doctor might be able to put you in touch with one?
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Hesmyguy Apr 2019
I've not heard of a specialist continence care nurse - but today he's opened an old rectal wound so I need to contact his doctor anyway and I can ask about it.

I have a friend who did 20 years of adult foster care so I can ask her. He just gets really upset with me when I have other people help him with shower or toilet problems (thinks I enjoy humiliating him) so I have hesitated to talk to her about it. Maybe he'll just have to live with it. 5 years is long enough to fight this battle alone.
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Um. By the way. If this isn't a rude question, how old are you? And how much help do you have with looking after your husband?
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Hesmyguy Apr 2019
I'm 71, with back and knee problems, neuropathy and arthritis in my hands and I have 7 hours help every two weeks that the county and I share payment on. NOT ENOUGH HELP!!! I do feel like I'm drowning - both emotionally and in pee and poop! It's not a rude question, by the way.
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You have to make a few open cut outs on the bottom of the extra pad that goes into the diaper or the urine will not be able to pass through from the pad to the bottom of the pad to the diaper or pull up. THat is a useless way to use a pad.
Also, the mercedes of diapers i found to be an italian brand called Panolini. We have no more leaks even if my mom drinks before bed.
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Hesmyguy Apr 2019
I'll look them up on line. Thank you.
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I had the same problem with my Husband.
I noticed 2 things that would occur.
1. laying down the urine would flow between "skin folds" so the absorbent part of the brief would not capture the urine before it ran out the side of the tab brief.
2. He would, as I fondly (no pun intended) put it, "re-position" himself so he was pointing anywhere but towards the absorbent portion of the brief.
Nothing I did would change these two facts so I just resigned myself to doing loads of wash. As well as sometimes washing the floor as well.
As he declined I was able to apply a condom catheter that he did not try to remove. But had I tried that previously he would have pulled it off resulting in possible skin abrasions.
If possible when you get him into bed do not put anything on him other than the briefs. This should make it easier to change him, he will be less wet and you will have less laundry. If he seems to get chilled put an extra sheet or lightweight blanket on him. A twin extra long "polar fleece" blanket is great light weight, warm but it breathes and it washes and dries fast. I has 2 or 3 of them for the bed and to use as a throw for him.

By the way have you ever tried wearing one of the briefs? either the tab type or the pull up? They keep you pretty warm and sweaty so if he is hot to begin with the incontinence products make you warmer.
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I'm fortunate that my DH, who is 63 and has chronic constipation asks to use the urinal. He only really has issues with urinary incontinence when he's asleep.

We've tried a lot of briefs -- I've been getting Tranquility OverNight Maximum Absorbency Underwear, XXL-Plus, 12 Ct from Jet.com. They're really good quality. Walmart has them too, through their app.

What kind of brief you get depends on how much help they can give you when you're cleaning up. I don't like the "tab" kind. The ones I mention above are briefs.

I also use the bed pads that Walmart sells -- 30 for $15.00, 30 x 36. I've been really happy with those, too.
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I've gone through MANY medical supply houses on the internet and they have been very good at recommending brands and sending me samples. I try them for a couple of days - both daytime and nighttime - and have charted them to keep track of successes. But that was easy, since the successes have been few. I also have used a number of local supply houses. I've tried substituting inserts to see if a combination works. It gets discouraging, to say the least.
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I had a similar problem. I found the "overnight" rated diapers (Tena and Depends) to be best, but for night, I inserted an "overnight guard" into the first diaper, then diapered over this combo with a second diaper. This wasn't a perfect solution, but with the washable pads plus a disposable one (to reduce wash loads)on top of the sheet, it helped a lot. Remember, diapers are one of the few over the counter items that qualify for a medical deduction for taxes. They are expensive so I shopped sales but I found the overnight thickness best for heavy wetters. One more thought - you have a couple of choices as to style of diaper - pull ups and the tabbed styles. Depending upon the size of your spouse, experiment with both. If he's slim, you might be able to utilize the tabbed ones and latch them over to the front more securely. If not, the pull ups are another option. Inserting the guards as a back up was very helpful. All of my diaper changes for my husband had to be performed in bed as he could not stand, so this is something you'll have to figure out for your particular situation.
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I believe (hope) I have! I'm using Tena Extra fully breathable underwear in XL and just started using the Tranquility Premium Protection "Super-Plus TopLiner Booster Contour Pads." They work for both bowel containment and urinary containment. I have had no leakage during the day- and night-time for the past 4 days. I have also noticed a lessening of skin redness because of their 'flow-through' design. If this keeps up, I'll become their Ambassador! ( I've also noticed he's sweating less, but that may be because he is being treated for a UTI.)
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I wonder if adding plastic pants over the diaper would help. I use them , just like what you would use on a baby, but for an adult. I am worried about a bad case of fecal incontinence at night with my DH. I haven't seen an accident yet but it gives him a little extra protection .
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