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We came home to find her sitting on the floor, no injuries, she said she fell but no explanation. We texted her that we were on the way home and she answered so she supposedly fell after that, about 10 minutes. Hasn't fallen in years, but we also haven't gone anywhere in years.

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What makes you think she faked it? Why would she? My MIL wound up on the floor plenty of times on the carpeting and was never injured, just lost her balance and was able to do a controlled fall. If your MIL is behaving oddly, she may be sliding into dementia, or could have a UTI, or she could have balance problems which is very common in the elderly.
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Hi Christine-
Ive been here on AC for about 5 years. It always amazes me that no matter how bizarre the situation may be - someone here has also experienced it. But, yours is the first other Falling on Purpose post I’ve seen. Yes, my mother “fell” on purpose. Why?

Its a long, complicated story about a complicated woman but I’ll try to be brief.

After a three week say in rehab my mother was moved from a IL apartment into an AL apartment. In the first ten days my mom fell twice. The AL admin said her “needs were to high” and that I needed to move her out. They agreed to give me time to find a good NH as long as an outside, licensed paid caregiver was with her.

So, that’s what we did. The process took about two months - due to my brother but that’s another story. My mom loved having the caregiver- both for companionship and seeing to her every want and need. Mom would have been THRILLED to live like that for the rest of her life but her outliving her money to pay for it was a concern. At least, for me. Mom had given away a huge chunk of change to “charities” - but that’s another story - and Medicaid wouldn’t have been an option for years.

Anyhoo - eventually, off to the NH mom went. A VERY nice, newer, private, boutique NH I might add, that mom hated before she ever got there - but that’s another story. Mom HATED the NH and wanted her 24/7 servant...err... caregivers back. What’s a gal to do, right?

Mom figured that since falling was
what got her 86’d from AL - falling would get her kicked out of the NH as well. Did I mention moms dementia? But, that’s another story.

It didn’t take long for mom to get busted falling on purpose. The give away was the time she had taken a pillow and blanket to be more comfortable on the floor while she waited to be discovered by some poor CNA.

After some time AND a visit to a Geriatric Psychiatrist along with a medication overhaul - the falls stopped. There was also a “Fall Plan” implemented by the NH which was very restricted in terms of allowing my mom to be alone in her room - a plan mom HATED. But together, it all stopped the falls.

Many months later...
Mom would forget that she was - by this time - wheelchair bound and she would get up in an attempt to walk. Mom wouldn’t really fall - it was more of a slow sinking to her knees as she hung onto something. Unable to get herself back up - that’s how they would find her. They would walk into her room and my mother would immediately snap “I didn’t fall. I was praying” in fear the dreaded Fall Plan would be reimplement.

You gotta laugh sometimes. Laugh or cry... but that’s another story.

I wish you the best of luck!
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NYDaughterInLaw May 2020
What a great answer, Rainmom! I always love reading your answers.
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Yes, my FIL faked falling, and other serious health problems, so that he could get attention. He also fell in reality. So you never knew unless you saw him. He was brazen about it, often just lying down on the ground and pretending to be comatose, even when other people were watching him, e.g. knowing he hadn't fallen, that he had just gotten himself down on the ground.

So, if your instincts are telling you that she faked it, she might have. On the other hand, as I said, she might just have been truly disoriented and scared from being alone, and felt faint, and took a tumble. Fear is a very real problem for elders. Their fear seems to be linked to them doing many strange things they wouldn't have in the past, and also can cause them to have panic attacks.
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My mother faked falling many times until she was able to qualify for a hip replacement. She also fell 'legitimately' meaning she'd have some pretty horrific bruises to show for it.

She also does this thing where she'll tell you she's been vomiting non-stop for hours, and you'll find her with a small basin in her lap---BUT no evidence of any vomit--place doesn't smell of it, the basin is dry, I actually took it from her hands once and it wasn't just dry, it was DUSTY.

She just craves attention, always has. Sadly, even though we have a huge family, she sees very few of us. She won't call just to chat--even tho any of us would enjoy a pleasant conversation. She cannot use her cell phone and YB won't reconnect her old landline. She doesn't want her 'problems' solved--she wants to complain.
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lkdrymom May 2020
That was my father. He craves attention and wants someone to 'fuss' over him. Anyone who knows me knows I am incapable of 'fussing'. Every time he called his first words were "I've got a problem...". The crazy thing was he seemed miffed when I solved his problems...he didn't want the problem 'fixed', he just wanted me there 'working on it'. Fixing it means there is nothing to fuss and dither over. I would not put a fake fall past him. So many phone calls "I think I am DYING!!!!" and there would be nothing wrong with him.
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I suspect my FIL once faked falling. He had one caregiver coming Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays for a few hours in the morning. The fall happened in the morning on one of her days off. He lives in indy living where there's a big red button to call for help in *every* single room with *two* in the bathroom (one next to the toilet and one in the shower). He fell in the bathroom and instead of pushing the button next to the toilet, he called my husband.

My husband dropped everything he was doing, drove over there to find his dad on the carpet outside the bathroom. He assists him up and asks what happened. No real explanation besides "I fell while peeing" and no injuries not even red knee caps. His pants were all zipped up and the toilet was flushed, odd considering he said he fell while peeing!

Anyway, that was the first and last time my husband went to pick his father up off the floor. He told him to use the red button because that's what he pays all that money for at indy living. After that, the caregiver started coming 5 days a week.

Both my husband and I believe he fake "fell" to get attention. He now has 2 shifts of caregivers 7 days a week despite not actually needing that much help. I think he's afraid to be alone. Yet he did not avail himself of most of the activities at indy living pre-pandemic. His money is running out.
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xhausted1 May 2020
I think the days get long when you’re not occupied. Their behavior should be a lesson to all of us who are more technologically inclined...we need to have “jobs” we can do from home...tutoring/teaching English on line, whatever. Life becomes a death sentence...literally...when the plans for the day are limited to eating and eliminating what you’ve eaten.
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I don’t have direct experience but I know a woman with a mother who did those kinds of things in order to control or induce guilt. She (Daughter) figured it out by installing cameras in the house. What you do about the behavior is another question. Does you mom have a controlling manner?
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gemswinner12 May 2020
Good advice! Get a motion-activated camera in place ( you can get the camera in a picture frame or teddy bear...not very expensive on amazon), then announce loudly that you’re leaving her alone . Make sure the camera’s in place, and go out to eat nearby ( if your restaurants are opening up soon...or a trip to the grocery store would also work).
The only downside to checking out this hunch would be if she manages to actually hurt herself while acting ( some famous actors have been hurt while working). Seriously though, it’s a good idea whether she’s faking or not; you could gain peace of mind while out on some well-deserved breaks.
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I think some people are so afraid they will be forgotten about that they will constantly make sure something is "wrong" so that they stay in the forefront of everyone's minds. A "fall" would certainly fit into this category and get them lots of attention.
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I purchased a "help I've fallen" button for my parents when they still lived in their home, and they had those buttons on for the rest of their lives. There is one that automatically calls for help when it senses a sudden drop/fall. That way, if she passes out and falls, or trips and falls, or just plain falls, help will be called immediately. Another option is to hire a companion to stay with her when you need to leave.
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I purchased a "help I've fallen" button for my parents when they still lived in their home, and they had those buttons on for the rest of their lives. There is one that automatically calls for help when it senses a sudden drop/fall. That way, if she passes out and falls, or trips and falls, or just plain falls, help will be called immediately. Another option is to hire a companion to stay with her when you need to leave. The "nanny cam" is also a really good idea.
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I feel this, I really do. Father in law has had some legitimate falls. But he has also had what we call "convenient" falls when his narcissistic supply is not flowing the way he likes it. The difference? When he really falls, there is some kind of injury, no matter how small. And he weighs 300+ pounds, so when he falls, you can hear it anywhere in the house and even someplaces just outside of the house.When it is more staged? He's basically on the floor in the most comfortable position possible, able to access phone and tv remote but not push the button on the lanyard somehow. And it is very quiet.
The last time he fell, sister in law and her husband, who live with him, had come to visit us. As FIL is unable to access our home because of several stairs, and he is capable of staying home for several hours alone, he was home. SIL/BIL and our family had just finished dinner and were getting ready for dessert when my husband's phone rang. He started off normal conversation for several minutes and then told him what happened. So he fell, in the floor, his phone beside of him and he told DH he was on his back. We stayed on the phone with him the entire time it took for SIL/BIL to get back to him. He had somehow flipped over while on the phone with DH (another clue, as he is like a turtle when he is on his back, he cannot roll over) and is now on his stomach, head near the bed. There was no sound of huffing or puffing or movement, which is also his signature especially on the phone because it brings the question "are you ok" repeatedly.
While on the phone, since this was not the first time and we saw the opportunity since he said his knee hurt, we told him when they got there an ambulance would be called and he would be transported because he really seemed to need evaluation. 2 times in the previous several weeks he had experienced "soft falls" and since he is two-person assist the fire department always has to come. So this time they transported and he went to rehab after the hospital. When COVID-19 illicited the stay at home order in our state I had a long talk with father in law (not the first time I've had similar talks with him when his convenient falls would not bring him what he was looking for) that he didn't want to have to call an ambulance for anything short of a real emergency right now because they wouldn't likely transport to the hospital (he LOVES it there) and if they did we would not be allowed to visit for the duration. Not a single fall. I know that he could legitimately fall. But we can see the signs when he is ramping up for a health crisis of his own making and in general it helps if we head him off. Another time we did this was when my mother and my brother in laws mother were both having surgery around the same time and our attention was naturally diverted. I told him if he had anything short of a real emergency he was going to be on his own. As soon and I do mean the day that my mother and BILs mother were ok to be on their own guess who called to say he was in the ER....for a cold ( they sent him home). So we know he has control over a number of these events. We take them all seriously because anyone of them could be. But we can definitely tell the difference now.
TL:DR story- yes we believe father in law stages "safe" falls when he isn't getting enough attention because it gains everyone including first responders on a non-emergency call.
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Wow, the stories of "fake falling" are fascinating... I would never have guessed. I keep learning new things on this forum daily.
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I think in some of the heads of our elders it's "desperate times call for desperate measures" and a fall fits that.
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Oh my Dad is an expert at it....

Last time he had a cold. Called the GP out 3 times. Called an ambulance a few times. All said "no you're fine". He was convinced he should be in hospital because he was "so ill"

Lo and behold, next day hes fallen, banged his head and ended up in hospital. Got what he wanted of course. Even the hospital admitted the wound was very suspect - it looks like he basically opened the cupboard door in the kitchen and scraped his head along the bottom a bit. His story was he'd forgotten he'd left it open and walked into it.

Total fabrication. Hes done this 2-3 times now. Last time I didnt even rush to the hospital to see him.

Trouble is I'm in the UK so all healthcare is free so no issues there. Also, I guess the health professionals err on the side of caution and take him in regardless and he knows this.

In the past, he has been banned from calling out the GP and the ambulance service did take 6 hours to come last time. They've got his card marked I think.

Paramedics I think are pretty close to 100% sure its a fake when they refuse to take him to hospital.

I've said this a number of times - hes cried wolf so many times I'll probably find him dead in his chair one day and I'll be like "Oops he was ill this time". I've made my peace with that - its his fault. I can't spend my life running back and fore 20 miles each time 1000 times just in case its not fake this one time.....
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Atmywitsend40 May 2020
I hate that people on the forum think that we are callous because we refuse to have the life zapped out of us by family that feel like they can have control of us until the choose to stop whenever that is. My granny is going to be 90 in Aug. Had always worked tirelessly to help her even when she didn't help me and kicked me out of the house because I wouldn't tell her my plans for the future. Worked 10 hours to pick her up across town fill out a 12 page application to have her tell me once we left that she didn't wanna take the apt because it was old people there and she doesn't think that the leasing lady wanted her to have the apt. This happened maybe 3 times before I am like I am not doing this with you. A couple of years later I move now she wants to get info about MY apts that is about 45 mins from her. That fizzles out. Got to the point where she was barely calling but going to all her religious services about 4 times a week . let her know that this was not something that I was going to doing running behind her to see about her well being. I am here to see about your well being not be a slave. She falls does not tell me for 2 weeks. Yes I went off because she knew what she was doing. About a month later she falls then calls me when heading to the hospital. Get to the room at the hospital the first thing out her mouth was where was her Chickfila. She get up to go to the bathroom by then the nurse in there. I have medical power of attorney the nurse lets me know that her pressure is sky high and that she is a fall risk. She hid her arm from me so I couldn't see her wrist band. It was the most hilarious thing ever to her that she had gotten over and went to the bathroom by herself. At that moment I realized that this is not something that I will be doing anymore because it is not good for my well being as a person. I check on her 3 times a week and have groceries delivered to her when needed. I refuse to spend my life stressed out because you refuse to let go of control and I have a life now. I definitely understand when you say that you are at peace with it because I did the same thing. I don't talk about it with people about it because you get the " you know growing old is hard" bs or Well it's your granny you only have one. You don't have to deal with her everyday so put a sock in it lol. I don't have to deal with abuse.
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In my previous profession I've seen used, and tried myself, to offer the most heinous offering available. One guy kept faking seizures so medics said Out loud WE ARE GOING TO HAVE TO INJECT HIS NECK! Guy jumped up screaming NOT IN MY NECK! NOT IN MY NECK! My recommendation is this.... stop running to their aid. Tell them since they cant be left alone they are going to a nursing home as a last resort. They SHOULD straighten up for awhile. Like children, they will regress so every couple of weeks have a new nursing home brochure laying around. Try it...
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xhausted1 May 2020
Those tactics are effective...I’ve used versions of them myself...and they do regress. They have mastered sucking the joy out of life and really don’t make you even want to be around them, let alone do anything to make their lives more pleasant.
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Yes. About 8 years ago, when my mom had no benchmark for how healthy old people behave and should behave, she tried that. Her neighbor was 10 years older than her and would legitimately fall...so of course that led to the faulty logic of “well, old people must fall to get attention”. So she tried that with...”fell” in the basement. So when I went to help her up, I explained to her that we’d be going to the doctor who would put her on a diet. Diet???? I explained to her that if she falls and can’t get up, she’ll have to lose about 30 pounds so she’d be more mobile. The threat of taking her awful grocery store coffee cake away was more than she could stand to think about. She didn’t “fall” again for years. Now, she is starting to fall, lose her balance, etc. The fake falls are different. Perhaps the biggest difference I noticed is she is afraid when she falls now...whereas with the fake fall, she wasn’t really afraid.

I live with my mom who will be 89 in a few weeks. I lived out of state for a 5 months last year And it wasn’t easy. She can’t hear and refuses to wear hearing aids she paid $5K for, so I never knew if she was sleeping through the phone ringing, if she did fall in the shower, or if she wasn’t with us anymore.

And as if that wasn’t enough stress, I’m constantly told “you never do anything around here...”

Right now, I’m relieved I never had children of my own. I have one now. I do wonder who will care for me when that time comes.
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cwinter May 2020
I'm in a similar boat w/ no kids, and from what I've read from some of the other participants, there are some pretty callous kids out there... so having kids is not a guarantee that you will be correctly looked after despite having birthed them. No easy solutions, but I think one can create support systems flying solo.
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If this happened just once, isn't it too early to categorize your mother in-law's situation as faked? It is certainly possible to fall without injury – I have fallen numerous times with no injuries – and getting up without holding onto something is often impossible. I suggest waiting to see if a similar situation occurs.
If your assessment IS correct, then her behavior may well be a cry for attention but you must be careful about buying into it. Perhaps suggesting a visit to her doctor to diagnose the problem will encourage her to rethink her behavior. And if there is a valid reason for her fall, then an attempt at diagnosis is definitely in order.
A frank discussion to reassure her that you love her and are there for her even when you are not physically present can never be a wrong move. Give her some slack – getting older is tough. It'll happen to you someday. It happens to us all--it's a relentless process. Aging ain't for sissies!
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DonnaF777 May 2020
And Ruth... THAT is exactly what they want... you running to them every time they call you and some do it several times a day and all hours of the day. Another commenter on here stated.....you need to hold them accountable for what is going on...... not just RUN TO THEM every time "something happens". They want to call the shots on everything and will have you running over there all the time and/or calling on the phone. Many have undiagnosed dementia so they have no reasoning abilities any more... they no longer care about YOU or anyones life. I have taken care of the elderly for over 25 years as a nurse/home health aide and they lie to get what they want..or they are so far gone into their dementia they don't know they are lying. You can't tell much of the time. I have one lady..... she has her grown daughter living with her even though this daughter has a husband, kids and grandkids and also works full time time. Mom says she will NEVER go into a facility which means what? This daughter is doing ALL grocery shopping like 3 times a week because mom is constantly needing something..picking up take out because mom has decided that she wants ribs tonight.. daughter does her med planner, picks up prescriptions, has to pay mom's bills, has to clean the house, PLUS take care of mom's dog which means dealing with groomers, taking dog to vet.... since groomer is not coming out during virus mess, daughter is now having to give dog a bath; dealing with my home health care agency and hospice. Daughter is doing a bunch of the cooking too because mom is always demanding home cooking like home made chicken and dumplings...I made her that and she had insisted on me using self rising flour... did not work so patient had me throw that out. Daughter was notified mom wanted chicken and dumplings...so daughter got it. Then we went through 2 types of chicken soup... and threw those out.. so daughter does the shopping and mom goes through the food very fast because she does not like it even though she is the one who ordered it! Complains about pain but refuses to take pain pills because she doesn't want to get hooked on them... (At this point, does not matter) Again,... SHE IS GOING TO STAY IN HER HOUSE but look at what this is costing he daughter and everyone else! She does not care. Daughter needs to put her foot down. This is her mom's life... her mom eats garbage... her diet has always been garbage so then has multiple health issues but look how mom's choices have and is affecting everyone around her! Please folks... do NOT allow your parents to take control of your life like this! Yes... we are to respect them but this is NOT respecting them. This woman does not care about others and what she is putting them through. She sits like a "queen"... able to do nothing on her own while ordering others around, This is WRONG. Daughter not living at her own house... with her own husband... and be with her own kids and grand kids because she allows her mother to bully her. Evidently this mom has always been this way. Sad... just sad. I know how this is... my mom was this way. My older brother got married... and wife had a small daughter...and when our mom tried this nonsense, my brother finally let her know that he was married and his duty was to his wife and daughter. My mom had no health issues that we knew of... she never went to doctor. Yeah.. she had gone over to their house, sat on the steps and bawling. Enough is ENOUGH!. Most people will take advantage of you, exploit you when you allow it. Many of these elderly should be in facilities. NOT AT HOME. The elderly, many are simply lonely and when they are AT HOME... they don't see people and do nothing all day. Put them into a facility where there are OTHER PEOPLE...to eat with, to play games with, to watch TV with...play bingo... reading clubs...musicians coming out all the time to listen to.. AT HOME is boring... so they call YOU. Kids are NOT obligated to do this
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When my mother fell, she couldn't get up on her own. She never hurt herself though. It is always a big worry they may fall when you are not there. Maybe she could carry her phone with her so if she falls she can call you.
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I haven't read the other responses but before I can give my opinion I would like to know how old your MIL is, does she live alone, how is her health, etc.

My 94 year old Mom has fallen (even with using her walker) and had no injuries. I know she didn't fall on purpose, she is older and doesn't have the balance she used to have. My Mom still tries to be independent because her entire life she was independent. She uses an electric heating pad and sometimes the plug comes out of the socket and instead of calling me to plug it back in she tries to do it herself, loses her balance and falls on the floor. Again, no injuries so far. I think I will duck tape the plug in.

Again, I would need more information regarding your MIL before I could give you my opinion.

Jenna
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No my mother has done same thing as well but she is marking herself and when I go to touch her move her she will start screaming that I’m hitting her we have camera in lounge she looks at it and she smile starts To mark her self I believe for attention
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gemswinner12 Jun 2020
Sandra, that sounds at least borderline sociopathic liar territory. She sounds like a real handful! I wonder what else your Mom has been up to?
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We have absolutely experienced this. Whenever she wants attention or believes she is due something; she will “fall” and then spend the next several days embellishing the story to the point she’s lucky to be alive. Strangely all these falls end up being our fault somehow.
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gemswinner12 May 2020
Tluther, Can you video record her Fake Fall Story? You would be the interviewer/ reporter, and ask her for more details:)) I truly believe it could turn out to be a keepsake years from now)).
I know it might seem strange, but my Mom’s been gone a few years, and I wish I had more videos and pictures of her last years; even though she had Alzheimer’s, bits of her humor and personality would pop out here and there.
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Hi. Oh yes! My 92 year old mother lives with us. Last week she told me she fell from the top stair to the bottom stair which lead to our garden (10 steps) and rolled under the BBQ where she lay for hours. She would have to be the size of a guinea pig to fit under there and I was in the house at the time and in and out of the garden. I am afraid its attention seeking Im sorry to say.
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cherokeegrrl54 May 2020
They love to confabulate certain things dont they?!?? 🙃
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Oh yes, I've experienced this. Mom does this for attention FOR SURE !!!. I know there was one occasion where she did fall but it was because she was shuffling and her slipper 'stuck' to the very thick carpet. She had a soft fall and did a roll...she was NOT hurt. I was in the next room coming into the room when I saw it happen and she was down before I could reach her. Fortunately she tripped while on a carpet and not hurt. But, she made it sound a WHOLE lot worse; I kept reassuring her she was okay and not hurt....she never even had a bruise or any sore muscles afterwards....(I kept checking just to make sure since she is on blood thinners )...I put ice on where I thought she might hurt just to fuss on her a little. But I heard her repeat the incident to a few girlfriends on the phone and she kept saying "I fell down yesterday and boy did I fall hard and I went 'clunk' ".... (she likes to use the word 'clunk') in fact, she was smiling and laughing about 30 minutes afterwards so that was another indication to me she was fine. (To me, 'clunk' indicates 'bad')...I'm sure it is traumatic for an elderly person to fall. I don't wish this on anyone. There was another time she tried to tell me she 'fell' but as I kept asking questions about it, she it turned out she didn't . she was looking sheepish at me so I knew then she was just fibbing...smh .... she lives with my brother and I see her every day for a few hours. So, I started spending a little more time with her because I'm sure she gets a little lonely when he's at work. He is now retired so she is not alone anymore. I still see her every day and do showers for her twice a week and other personal hygiene things. No more 'falling'...first make sure she/he's okay, then fuss on them a little because that's all they want is a little more fussing....grin and bear it. Lots of love and triple doses of patience...if it 'keeps happening' more often, and as horrible as it might seem, mention it might be safer to be in a facility for their well being... it may lessen the faking...and, if it really does keep happening, then it may be the best place . I won't put Mom in one unless it's absolutely necessary. But, for safety reasons or medical are I will.
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Go to an Alzheimer's conference or ask the local rep for a list on how to accident proof your home. Then there will be no doubt. Arbitrary gambling will earn her and you a trip to the E-room and then an osteo-doc-- my Mom's shoulder took forever to heal and then led to her greater decline and eventual death.
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gemswinner12 May 2020
There’s no way to completely accident proof a home in real life. Just ask any parent!!
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A couple things could happen here. If this is a fake fall, then she runs the risk of having "cried 'wolf' " and not being believed if she has a "real" fall.

Another is that if it's due to dementia, then she is liable to be put in a facility for dementia (where she would belong), but if it is fake, then she may end up in such a facility but not like being there! It's like the small child claiming s/he's too sick to go to school, so the parents say s/he'll go to the doctor to get a shot to treat the sickness.
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MargaretMcKen May 2020
I convinced my small daughters that if they were sick the first aid was a glass of lemon juice. It worked wonders!
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My mom just passed away Tuesday from 3 fractures suffered when The power lift chair she was on practically hurled her across our CARPETED floor. She was alert and in pain - knee swelled up immediately and could tell maybe had dislocated shoulder and black eye. All on her left side of the body. Please be careful with theses chairs. My parents have had them for years. We aren’t sure if she may have fell asleep on the remote or if she got confused with up and down buttons and it was too late by time she could figure out she cried out for help. My dad was on his chair sleeping 4 feet away and heard her cry out then he called for help (he can’t walk due to hip fracture suffered during hospital stay). The fall broke her clavicle humerus and femur. The chairs have been of great use over the last 6 years but we never envisioned this situation or gave it much thought to how high they can go without a safety mechanism in place to override / confirm how high up you really want to go. Please share this so any of your family members do not have to go through this awful situation. I was looking for grief advice- being second day since my mom’s gone and saw this question and I wonder if it was my mom’s way of telling me “make your mess your message” and help others So sad right now- gave her the best care we could and this was what contributed to her leaving us. In honor of my mom please be careful
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gemswinner12 May 2020
HoustonPat; my deepest condolences for your loss, and thank You for the heads-up about those power chairs. They do sound potentially dangerous for elders.
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My MIL used to have injuries that, somehow, always happened when she had an audience.
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Others have posted many valuable comments on this forum, about seniors and their "fake falls" as an attention-getting tactic. It's the same thing that a toddler does learning to walk; if they have an audience, they wail and fuss as if they have been tortured. If there is no audience, they pick themselves back up and carry on as if nothing ever happened.

Have you installed "nanny cams" in the house to monitor her safety? You might consider doing this. Put them up high, such as near the ceiling, so she cannot reach them - and might even forget that they are there. (Out of sight, out of mind.)
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gemswinner12 May 2020
Yes! Many people forget that cameras are there, even when they have been told, signed a waiver, and stand the chance of losing a job. I have a friend who is a bank president; every week he is forced to fire at least one employee who misbehaved badly ~in spite of knowing cameras are EVERYWHERE inside banks. Everything from sex in break rooms, to check-forging and outright stealing cash from customers.
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Video camera.
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My 93 year old father will lower the bar on his hospital style bed if a box is not put under the bar. He can’t sit up by himself but he can somehow manage to slide to the floor. No injuries, no pain, but it takes two people to lift him to sitting on a chair or walker. The home health nurse says it counts as a fall. In my dad’s case I think he doesn’t realize he can’t manage on his own. Instead of asking for help he wants to get up so he tries to get up. Then he is surprised at the outcome.
I am not a fusser type person. It feels fake, and my dad was never that way with me. I simply tell him how expensive a nursing home is and if he wants to stay at my house here is what he needs to do. Straightforward works for some people.
faking a fall is quite possible, but if they get consequences they don’t like they are less likely to fake things.
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ButterCuP7 May 2020
The lady I work with gets up, walks very good when she doesn't think about it. As soon as her mind comes to grips with what she did then fear takes over and she can't walk. When we are use to doing things and suddenly we can't that is very fearful to them. Just my thoughts.
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A nanny cam that's out of reach! Should probably let her know it's there.
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Mjustice98 May 2020
Great idea
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