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I make her get ready at 9:30 pm. She wants to stay up until 10 but then she acts helpless and I have to undress her and put her to bed. Should she be getting ready earlier?

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Is your mother able to get herself ready at 9:30?

What if she got ready at 9:30 or even 9:00, but stayed up until 10:00 or when ever she wanted to go to bed?

Is your main concern that she needs your help if starts getting ready too late?
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My mother is 96. She is now in a NH, but before that she could get ready for bed without any problem, but if my sisters were there, she was suddenly helpless. I refused to take part in the sham and she would take care of herself.
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If your mom doesn't go out much, buy her cutesy housecoats. Sleeping in them at night and putting on a fresh one in the morning. That's what I did for mom. They make really pretty ones, too. I even had sparkley trinkets to match most of them so she'd feel dressed up.

Then there's no getting ready for bed. (Mom was the same way. Had trouble getting her to bed...she always wanted to stay up longer.)
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Oh my gosh! I cannot imagine how difficult it would be to have my Mom with Alzheimer's up that late! Her hubby with general age related decline had been going to bed at 9 up until about three months ago. He is now going to bed at 8. My Mom is entering the later stages of Alzheimer's and she is up late 7:00. She is usually in bed about 6:15 or 6:30. And she sleeps until 8:30 or 9:00, sometimes even later.

Mom attends a day program that keeps her busy and wears her out so usually has a good night's sleep. Is there some sort of a day program that your Mom could attend? The days when my Mom is home, she sleeps a good part of the day and still sleeps well at night. Thank goodness!
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Bernieg, looking at your profile I don't see mention of dementia. What is your mother's health status?
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I was just telling about my Mom's dementia because it has an unbelievable effect on her sleep. Berneig, the reason a day prograj would help is that she will make many new friends, and stimulate the brain.
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I think Chicago has the answer. Let her do it herself.
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