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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
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III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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She had the neuropsych test. After the doc said she can't live alone or drive. She's currently in an assisted living facility, but I want to see if she can live in a retirement facility?
She could only live in a retirement facility if she has home care, if the instructions are that she should not live alone. Ask for details on why she shouldn't live alone, is it fall risk? Is she forgetting to take her medications? Does she have dementia? Where does she need assistance? If she has dementia, she would be best in a memory care facility, where skilled staff know what to do during the different phases of dementia. If she's still mentally and physically competent, perhaps she could live in assisted living with shuttle services to doctor appointments, outings, and shopping.
I live in a retirement community. A car is essential. I still have to cook and gather food, plus see my doctors. There are a few in my community that do not belong here. We can call APS. If that is what you want to happen, then someone else may be appointed in her care and financials. With think assisted living, someone will have to get her to her doctors. It is not locked down so she could wander off. She needs to get herself down to eat so she has to still be aware of time. With Memory care, it will be a locked place. Staff will let her know when it is time to eat. Some have on site visiting doctors and others will not. Her doctor is telling you that it is now before things become unsafe
Now that you got the surprise, she will need a new home and someone in your family needs to start visiting places or taking her in. Plus someone needs to oversee her bills.
rosellifamily4: As you state in your profile that your mother unfortunately suffers from dementia, a retirement community would not serve her current health needs. Bear in mind, her health needs will deteriorate and her physician has already advised you.
Is your mom unhappy with where she is? If she was placed in AL she qualified for it apparently unless this is a temporary placement for rehab of some sort. If she is unhappy why is that, those questions might be important while deciding where to place her.
If she doesn’t have dementia, she might be a candidate for an apartment in a retirement community with elevators, meals, transportation, activities. It’s for the person who isn’t totally independent but doesn’t need one on one care.
If she needs assisted living, please do not consider independent retirement facility because it means she needs assistance that is not available.
We tried living in an independent living retirement facility because I felt it would help me as a caregiver since meals and light housekeeping was included. What happened was, to fill empty apartments, the management began to bring in folks who needed assistance but the families only hired caregivers for a few hours a day to help. The rest of the time they were on their own and when they needed help they began turning to their neighbors who were elderly themselves. They still are alone in their apartment except times they come out into the public areas.
It is one thing for folks who have been living independent in the facility for a long time, the neighbors are already friends and they don't mind offering a helping hand when needed. But when someone new comes in already needing assistance and begin asking neighbors for help, they are often resented.
The worse case scenario is she may turn to someone for help who is worse off than she is. This can be dangerous because they may be trading medicines, "borrowing" from each other or have other issues trying to get along.
If I feel I really need the amenities of an independent living facility, I would try it again but I would not be as social to avoid others turning to me for help. It did make my job easier with my husband but I would still be sure he had me or someone else providing 24/7 care just like in our home.
Great advice & insight. Very helpful that you shared your experience. I see this scenario where my mom is currently living in a beautiful independent senior community. I am there supporting my mom many days a week to keep her in independent living, and happy! I find I want to assist her neighbors with difficult things… but I realize that could get out of hand real quick. Thanks again.
As others have said there are big differences between assisted living facilities, nursing homes, memory care facilities, independent senior living, and retirement communities.
To start with, your mother's doctor needs to explain to you what he means by 'can't live alone anymore'. That's your starting point. If your mother needs to be supervised 24/7 and can no longer make decisions or be held responsible for her actions because of dementia, she should be in a locked memory care facility.
If she struggles with ADL's like making meals, staying clean, loneliness and depression, but is still lucid enough that she doesn't need to be locked in, then she would probably be a good fit for a nice AL facility with plenty of socialization and activity.
A retirement community or independent senior living facility does not have the appropriate level of care for her if her doctor is telling you she cannot be alone anymore.
Get the doctor to explain better to you so you can make the right decision for your mother.
A retirement facility sounds like an over 55 apartment with lots of planned activities, but not necessarily supervision or assistance. From what the doctor says, your mom needs a set of eyes on her and if she doesn't already need help with things, she is moving in that direction. I would not lessen the level of care. I would keep her in assisted living, then as things start to happen like forgetting to go to the dining room to eat or she attempts to leave the facility or has the same clothes on for days on end, they will notice and recommend memory care.
A lot depends on how much time you have to keep moving her and her belongings up in care. From what you describe, she needs memory care. This is usually a locked facility. If she is still driving now, she will try to walk out
She will need more and more help as time goes on. Maybe sooner rather than later, you never know how fast a decline will occur. One of the "problems" with most Assisted Living or even a "retirement community" for someone with dementia is that the facility is not secure meaning if the resident wants to leave they can. Most cases they have to sign out but in many cases people just leave to go to the store or whatever. If it is a small facility and the people know all the residents someone may stop mom if she leaves but often doors are not monitored particularly after "normal" hours. If mom is in an AL now is there a Memory Care wing in the same facility? If so that might be the next move mom should make. She can remain where she is until it gets to the point where she needs more monitoring.
I would have the facility where she is now assess her or do so over the next week or so and let you know what they think
All retirement communities and all levels of senior aging residency , facilities, ALF, Memory Care, skilled care etc etc have requirements that residents must meet to be considered appropriate for that level of care. Your mother needs a " level of care needs assessment" ( which the PCP has started) and a licensed social worker or other case manager can help you determine what facility she needs and options for her care.
" Retirement community" often means independent living; some do offer levels of care such as memory care and skilled care as well as ALF. It sounds like if she is in ALF already that her PCP has identified that she needs more care than ALF provides. Get a case manager assigned to help you both.
I'm not sure what the difference is between an Assisted Living Facility and a Retirement Facility.
Basically, the doctor is saying that she needs an able-bodied person to be on call, close to her, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
That means to me, that if she is living in Independent Living, she needs a full time caregiver. If she is living in Assisted Living, she probably has people on call to help her and ensure her needs are met, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
So yes, she probably can live in a retirement facility, however, she also needs a caregiver nearly full time to fill in those areas which she is not capable.
Her brain is dying and she is never going to regain skills. She is only going to decline. Keep her where she is and she will eventually have to move to a higher level of care.
Or did I miss something important? Why would you want to move her to even less care than she has now?
She has dementia, she needs to be in AL until she is moved to MC.
Don't quite understand your reason for asking this. There is not much difference from IL & AL except the person is in AL because they need more care and are no longer independent. There are activities, bus trips to stores, meals are provided and more.
Only speaking for what my family and I have learned and benefited from, but where I am, there is major difference between IL and AL, between AL and MC, and between MC and SNC.
Fees for each level of service are higher depending upon need.
My recent LO placement entered AL because her ADLs were at a high level, but within a little over a month she was moved to MC because she was a persistent escape risk.
Adjustment to MC took about 6 months but was definitely the placement that was best.
Barbs post is a little confusing to me. The AL she discribes seems to be what LTC is to me. Her IL seems to be what an AL is to me.
If the doctor said my Mom could not live alone, an AL would be my choice. In my Moms AL, your care was determined by your needs. There were people there that still performed their ADLs. Even cooked in their own rooms. Did their own laundry. Not everyone needed help bathing, dressing ect. One woman was there because of her husband, he died and she chose to stay. She liked the staff and the people. There were activities, outings and entertainment. And socialization. So, I think ur Mom is where she needs to be if her AL is how I described my Moms. Maybe where ur AL is different so a Senior facility may fit her needs.
Independent living where I live means an apt where ur on ur own. There are no aides. If you need any help, u transfer to an AL. The IL does provide meals usually in a dining room. A place to socialize, activities, outings and entertainment.
I agree, ask your Office of Aging for an evaluation.
Whats the difference, in your opinion, between a retirement facility and an Assisted Living facility she's currently living in? She needs all the help she can get, with more to come down the road, is what her doc is telling you. An Assisted Living facility should be equipped with Memory Care Assisted Living accommodations so mom can segue into that wing or bldg as needed w/o making another move.
My mom had a neuropsych test and was told she could no longer live alone. Prior to that, seeing big changes in her ability to manage day to day life, we moved her to a nice AL where other family members had settled in well.
It was a disaster. It was too much help of the wrong kind.
Mom ended up in the hospital and we asked for a psych consult. The geriatric psychiatrist pointed out that mom didn't need help with Activities of Daily Living (toileting, bathing, dressing). She was riddled with anxiety and lonely. He recommended someplace where there were always people and staff around, lots of activities and ongoing therapy from an onsite mental health professional.
We got mom into a good Independent Living Facility--3 meals a day, housekeeping, a doctor and psychiatrist with offices on site. Her anxiety was medicated with a mild benzo; I set up her pill boxes once a week and my SIl and my brother managed her money.
Think about asking for a professional "needs assessment" from either the local Area Agency on Aging or get a recommendation from her doctors as bout who can best assess her needs.
It's really a matter of a good fit between mom's needs and what the facility provides, rather than what it's called.
I agree with AlvaDeer that if by "retirement facility" you mean senior living community or independent living... no, she can't. She cannot live without assistance now and those places don't offer that. It would be a disaster for both of you to put her in that type of place.
I don't know what you mean by retirement facility. If you mean independent living, no, it is unlikely if she cannot live alone that she can do independent living. Speak with mom's doctor for these questions as he is the one who knows this individual patient.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
With think assisted living, someone will have to get her to her doctors. It is not locked down so she could wander off. She needs to get herself down to eat so she has to still be aware of time. With Memory care, it will be a locked place. Staff will let her know when it is time to eat. Some have on site visiting doctors and others will not. Her doctor is telling you that it is now before things become unsafe
Now that you got the surprise, she will need a new home and someone in your family needs to start visiting places or taking her in. Plus someone needs to oversee her bills.
We tried living in an independent living retirement facility because I felt it would help me as a caregiver since meals and light housekeeping was included. What happened was, to fill empty apartments, the management began to bring in folks who needed assistance but the families only hired caregivers for a few hours a day to help. The rest of the time they were on their own and when they needed help they began turning to their neighbors who were elderly themselves. They still are alone in their apartment except times they come out into the public areas.
It is one thing for folks who have been living independent in the facility for a long time, the neighbors are already friends and they don't mind offering a helping hand when needed. But when someone new comes in already needing assistance and begin asking neighbors for help, they are often resented.
The worse case scenario is she may turn to someone for help who is worse off than she is. This can be dangerous because they may be trading medicines, "borrowing" from each other or have other issues trying to get along.
If I feel I really need the amenities of an independent living facility, I would try it again but I would not be as social to avoid others turning to me for help. It did make my job easier with my husband but I would still be sure he had me or someone else providing 24/7 care just like in our home.
To start with, your mother's doctor needs to explain to you what he means by 'can't live alone anymore'. That's your starting point. If your mother needs to be supervised 24/7 and can no longer make decisions or be held responsible for her actions because of dementia, she should be in a locked memory care facility.
If she struggles with ADL's like making meals, staying clean, loneliness and depression, but is still lucid enough that she doesn't need to be locked in, then she would probably be a good fit for a nice AL facility with plenty of socialization and activity.
A retirement community or independent senior living facility does not have the appropriate level of care for her if her doctor is telling you she cannot be alone anymore.
Get the doctor to explain better to you so you can make the right decision for your mother.
A retirement community usually offers residents a chance at socialization, activities, meals, and housekeeping. They really don't offer care.
One of the "problems" with most Assisted Living or even a "retirement community" for someone with dementia is that the facility is not secure meaning if the resident wants to leave they can. Most cases they have to sign out but in many cases people just leave to go to the store or whatever.
If it is a small facility and the people know all the residents someone may stop mom if she leaves but often doors are not monitored particularly after "normal" hours.
If mom is in an AL now is there a Memory Care wing in the same facility? If so that might be the next move mom should make. She can remain where she is until it gets to the point where she needs more monitoring.
I would have the facility where she is now assess her or do so over the next week or so and let you know what they think
" Retirement community" often means independent living; some do offer levels of care such as memory care and skilled care as well as ALF. It sounds like if she is in ALF already that her PCP has identified that she needs more care than ALF provides.
Get a case manager assigned to help you both.
Basically, the doctor is saying that she needs an able-bodied person to be on call, close to her, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
That means to me, that if she is living in Independent Living, she needs a full time caregiver. If she is living in Assisted Living, she probably has people on call to help her and ensure her needs are met, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
So yes, she probably can live in a retirement facility, however, she also needs a caregiver nearly full time to fill in those areas which she is not capable.
Or did I miss something important? Why would you want to move her to even less care than she has now?
What kind of assistance does your mother get in AL now? Is she driving now?
What is your definition of a "retirement facility"?
Don't quite understand your reason for asking this. There is not much difference from IL & AL except the person is in AL because they need more care and are no longer independent. There are activities, bus trips to stores, meals are provided and more.
Fees for each level of service are higher depending upon need.
My recent LO placement entered AL because her ADLs were at a high level, but within a little over a month she was moved to MC because she was a persistent escape risk.
Adjustment to MC took about 6 months but was definitely the placement that was best.
If the doctor said my Mom could not live alone, an AL would be my choice. In my Moms AL, your care was determined by your needs. There were people there that still performed their ADLs. Even cooked in their own rooms. Did their own laundry. Not everyone needed help bathing, dressing ect. One woman was there because of her husband, he died and she chose to stay. She liked the staff and the people. There were activities, outings and entertainment. And socialization. So, I think ur Mom is where she needs to be if her AL is how I described my Moms. Maybe where ur AL is different so a Senior facility may fit her needs.
Independent living where I live means an apt where ur on ur own. There are no aides. If you need any help, u transfer to an AL. The IL does provide meals usually in a dining room. A place to socialize, activities, outings and entertainment.
I agree, ask your Office of Aging for an evaluation.
My mom had a neuropsych test and was told she could no longer live alone. Prior to that, seeing big changes in her ability to manage day to day life, we moved her to a nice AL where other family members had settled in well.
It was a disaster. It was too much help of the wrong kind.
Mom ended up in the hospital and we asked for a psych consult. The geriatric psychiatrist pointed out that mom didn't need help with Activities of Daily Living (toileting, bathing, dressing). She was riddled with anxiety and lonely. He recommended someplace where there were always people and staff around, lots of activities and ongoing therapy from an onsite mental health professional.
We got mom into a good Independent Living Facility--3 meals a day, housekeeping, a doctor and psychiatrist with offices on site. Her anxiety was medicated with a mild benzo; I set up her pill boxes once a week and my SIl and my brother managed her money.
Think about asking for a professional "needs assessment" from either the local Area Agency on Aging or get a recommendation from her doctors as bout who can best assess her needs.
It's really a matter of a good fit between mom's needs and what the facility provides, rather than what it's called.