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The day staff is awesome. The night staff do not attend to her and get her to the bathroom. So she calls at all hours. Other facilities in my area do not have good ratings either. What can I do? She has terrible anxiety and wants things done perfectly. I'm getting NO sleep at night.

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I'm sorry you're both having these troubles. Expecting perfection is feeding into her anxiety and is of course, unrealistic. Is her anxiety being treated? If not, you may want to discuss this with her doctor. Maybe some meds temporarily while she's in rehab may help. How many times a night does she need help with toileting? Does she have any cognitive/memory impairment? Please be on the lookout for UTIs, which are very common in elderly women and can cause dementia-like symptoms.
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Gudder, welcome to the forum!

I think I would ask for a meeting with the DON (director of nursing) and ask how you can work together to solve this nighttime toileting issue. Do they keep a record of calls for assistance (my mom's NH had a computerized bell system, so the actual requests and response times were recorded). Is mom pushing the button hard enough? Is she becoming anxious because she doesn't see staff bustling around the way they are during the day?

I would not leap to the conclusion that the staff is slacking off until you make them aware of the fact that there is a problem.

Why does mom call you? Do you then call the facility to tell them that mom needs assistance? We had the experience of mom calling us with issues because she didn't want to "bother" the staff.
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I agree. You take this to the Director of Nursing. She/he oversees the Nurses, LPNs and Aides. Approach it as your are getting calls all night that Mom says she is requesting help and not receiving it. You were wondering how to solve the problem. Don't accuse. Could be her button doesn't work. Could be she thinks someone should be there immediately. If you find that this is the problem, then block her calls at night. She is just going to have to wait. I would ask the DON if there is something Mom can be given for her anxiety if she is not already being treated for it.

I agree, night shift doesn't have the supervision that daytime has but there has to be an RN or LPN on duty overseeing the aides. My daughter says that nighttime is not all that quiet.
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File a complaint against the facility with Medicare.

Put it in writing and give a copy to the DON and facility administrator. Tell them it will be sent to Medicare if you get one more call in the middle of the night because the workers are screwing off and not taking care of patient needs.

Be a squeaky wheel to get her the care she is paying for.

Night shifts don't have the same supervision and tend to be screw offs, someone needs to bring this to the attention of management.
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