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My mom (in her 60s) has been caring for her mother (in her 80s) with dementia for the last ~5+ years. It has been getting worse - really bad actually. I'll spare the details, but suffice it to say, my mom needs a break.


I'd really like to take my mom away for a weekend, just 1 or 2 nights. We talked about bringing my grandmother but .. I don't think that would be a good option and I don't think it would give my mom the break she needs (she'd be just anxious and responsible for my grandmother the whole time).


I would offer to do it, but that would mean leaving my wife with the baby; plus my mom would probably want to get away with me in attendance as well.


Does anyone know of options for someone that needs full-time adult supervision for a few days or a week, on or near Long Island New York?

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Call visiting angels or a similar firm, they offer overnight care. Please don't take gram with...that's no break for mom.
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Many Memory Care facilities will take someone for respite.
If Grandma is on Hospice, Medicare pays for 1 week of respite per year.
It sounds like placing grandma in a memory care facility might be the best option. Your mom, in her 80's probably has enough of her own problems without caring for grandma.
Another option would be to hire a caregiver to come in for the length of time. It would probably take several people to cover the 2 days.
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worriedinCali Jan 2020
They actually pay for up to 5 nights. Not a full week.
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Is there some reason you can't leave your wife with a baby for 1 or 2 nights? When we had DD hubs traveled 2 weeks out of the month for business and I survived. I am sure your wife knows the score, and would probably be ok.. Do you have any relatives who could watch your GM for a few days? My Aunt is a godsend to us. Of course mom would like you with her,, so go for it. If nothing else, many facilities offer respite care , we used this for my Dad.
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Username123 Jan 2020
Thanks. I’m certainly willing. Grandma needs help changing diapers, cleaning up after herself, taking her insulin, changing her clothes, shower / bathing. She gets incredibly combative if a male tries to help (even professionals). However, good point.
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