3 of 4 siblings support a recent increase in MG due to increased seizures for Petite Mal (Epilepsy). Can we expect any support from Dr or legal in advising this sibling to stop telling our mom she doesn't need this RX? It is detrimental so that she can prevent a seizure.
Going to court may seem like a good idea, but unless Mom is incompetent to make her own decisions (as certified by doctors) no guardian will be appointed for her. From your description she would not qualify as incompetent.
I'd try the routes you are asking about. Talk with her doctor or the doctor's assistant and ask if he would write a letter addressed to all of you and stating that the medication he has recently changed the dosage for must be taken as directed or it will not be effective. This will be tricky because of confidentiality concerns but perhaps it can be general enough to get by that. BUT it sounds not not being effective is exactly what Sister wants, so that may not help.
Have you dealt with an Elder Law attorney? Consult one now. Perhaps she or he could write a strongly worded letter stating that interference with her medical treatment could be considered neglect or abuse. I suppose your sister has the legal free speak right to tell Mother any things she wants to, but a lawyer may be able to advise you of ways to discourage this.
If mother's health ever requires a nursing home, would she potentially need Medicaid? Somebody better explain to her that if she signs off on the debt it will be considered a gift and interfere with her Medicaid application. This is something else the attorney might be able to help with.
By the way, is your sister mentally ill in some way? She doesn't sound all there.
This sister needs a slap of reality. You do need outside help, for one thing, I am sure all the other sis have talked to her and it rolls off her back like water off a duck.
Get legal. FAST. Call the dr., explain to him/her the situation. Don't wait sweetly for an appointment. Make sure that dr tells sis to her face that stopping any medication can cause irreparable damage. Get your legal representative to step up to sis too. (And let sis know that ALL of the costs incurred by getting her to STOP influencing mom are coming out of the "kitty" so to speak and she is shooting herself in the foot.")
Oh, the bloodsucking relatives. There seems to be at least one in every family.
However just a whisper in sis' ear that this is your plan plus you will be bringing up at court about her interference in mom's medicine against dr's advice could result in her getting $0.00 - document all your concerns now [write a letter & have it time stamped & held by lawyer] & if possible record her telling mom not to take meds - she may back off so fast you get whiplash - good luck
1.) Get your 2 other siblings together in a meeting with your problem sister, and tell her that if she doesn't quit stealing money from your mother (because that's what she is doing), you are going to file a police report against her & take her to court. Tell her that if she continues trying to have your mother "sign off" on the debt, you will file a lawsuit against her & all the "payback" money she thinks that she is saving will be used for legal fees---that money, and much more. Let her know that you can show that she has stolen the money & used it to buy herself a fancy car, cell phones for her grandchildren, etc. When polite & unpolite methods have failed, it is time to move on to legal methods. Your sister probably knows that you & your 3 siblings can't really do anything---but when legal authorities step in, she isn't going to be able to fight that by herself.
2.) Tell your mother that she simply CAN NOT stop taking her seizure medication & not to listen to your problem sister under any circumstances.
3.) Tell your problem sister that is she doesn't stop doing what she is doing, particularly in telling your mother not to take the seizure medication, you will get a restraining order against her & prevent her from seeing your mother because she is putting your mother's life in danger. She is clearly putting your mother in danger by not re-paying what she owes & having your mother live under the threat of losing her home.
Blocking her contact with your mother is the only way you can stop this behavior. When you pursue other avenues to stop her from doing the things she is doing, perhaps she'll get the picture.
Thank you for your response. Our 93 year old mother lives by herself in her home. She is still pretty sharp. Can walk, talk and think on her own. Unfortunately our sister approaches her with a victim poor me entitlement mentality. She whines and whimpers and plays on our Mother's heart strings. She manipulates her by telling her she works 3 (part time) jobs seven days a week and gets no sleep! We have shared facts and figures, had tough love conversations, talked with mom separately, talked with sibling separately and asked her politely and unpolitely. This sister borrowed $ against our parents home and makes payments only when it's convenient. She bought a cadillac, pays for her gr kids cell phones and saves payback AFTER she pays her own bills!! Our mother has now repaid back 75% of the 2nd mtg. Our mother said if the payments aren't made she could lose her house. Our sister told someone that she talked to a lawyer and that if she can get our mom to sign off the debt she doesn't have to make anymore payments! She also said if and when mother passes away - so will all the debt that is owed AND thus=that's why she tells her to stop taking her medicine!
Poor excuse for a daughter, right?
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