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Anyone have a loved one that is walking around the house (With a walker) one day and the two days later you have to lift them out of the bed because they have no strength?


My wife goes through the wild and extreme swings in her abilities that make no sense.


She had a stroke almost 4 years ago now, and almost everyday is different and you have no idea one day to the next how much care she is going to require.x

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This is something you need to discuss with her doctor. Any sudden changes such as she is experiencing daily could signal a lot of things from a reaction to meds, small strokes, a misfiring connection in her brain, etc.
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There are certain conditions that cause changing abilities.
You can ask her doctor and maybe the doctor will order physical therapy to strengthen her.
These come to mind:
Fibromyalgia
Chronic Fatique
Parkinson's
UTI
Depression
and so many others
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It is very odd. And it must be extremely discouraging for both of you.

I agree that this should be reported to her doctor and investigated. Meanwhile - have you tried keeping a daily journal to see if you can identify any patterns or possible causes?

Is your wife able to describe how she's feeling? And, I wonder if giving her extra time after waking (she could take any pain relief she's prescribed, and/or have a hot drink) to "gather" herself might help fend off bad days.
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Is there a consistence in the pattern, such as one good day followed by 2 bad days, or 3 bad days?   

And, importantly, what's her diet like?  Is she getting enough iron?  Has she ever been D'x'd as anemic?   I deal with that myself and know what it's like to have no energy to just get up, and it's all food related.
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Oh dear. I first thought of Depression which SendHelp mentions as well. If the "weakness" is mood-dependent, your wife just may not have the emotional energy on "down" days to put out the effort to get up and move on her own.
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I am also having issues with my husband who has LBD. For the last two weeks, he starts off fine in the morning, able to walk with his walker and get around, but around 2 p.m he seems to start losing all strength in his legs and back. This continues to progress until he's walking in almost a fetal position, because he is so stooped over and the feet act like they are cemented to the floor. When he is like this, it takes every bit of strength to hold him up and get him undressed and in bed. I ask him to try and straighten up and move his feet, but he seems not to be able to do either. There have not been any new medication changes, so I have no idea what is going on and the Dr's don't seem to know either. It's just baffling that he's fine during the morning and totally unable to walk or stand up straight the next. Has anyone else seen this problem and was the problem identified? UTI has been ruled out as well as dehydration.
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2ndTimothy Oct 2019
Hi Chill47,

Yes...this is common with different forms of dementia such as Lewy Body Dementia (LBD). My mother was diagnosed with LBD over 6 years ago and she experiences the same type of unpredictable mobility challenges. Each day is and will be different. Caregivers and medical professionals such as nurses will often times be clueless as to what LBD is and does. The bottom line is that the brain controls the entire body, and forms of dementia hinder the brains communication with the entire body - at different times affecting different body parts. There are some prescriptions that are meant for Parkinsons patients that help the rigidity in the body but they come with horrible side effects. All a caregiver can do is be patient and supportive. I found the best approach is to ensure that nothing else could be hindering there mobility such as dehydration, low potassium or magnesium, low sugar, etc. I also ensure my mother has a daily dose 5-15 minutes of sunshine, fresh air in the home by airing the house out daily, eating balanced meals that do not lead to constipation, and when she is able to walk slowly for as long as she can to keep the muscles used (use them or lose them. Unfortunately most doctors will be of no assistance and will sum it up to the "progression of the dementia". It is challenging to keep trying different things but it helps...

For example, I purchased a WaterPik (water flosser) to personally assist my mother with her oral hygiene; I purchased ALWAYS DISCREET diapers and told her they were only in case she couldn't make it to the bathroom quick enough; I purchased special utensils with better grip and thickness to help her when she is able to hold a fork/spoon herself; I installed hand rails in her bathroom; I purchased a personal table that adjusts to her level when she eats meals --- I could go on and on. I do a lot of research on the internet on how to make life as comfortable for my mother as possible since this disease is not curable -- at least by man. Each person with these type of dementias have different needs and it takes attentive people to address their needs without making them feel helpless or hopeless. It's a balancing act with their care and to keep up our own care. Best wishes on this journey.
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Most likely dementia plays a part in this. Second, I would seek out another medical opinion. And third, face the fact that you cannot fix this or handle this long term and you should not have to. Seek professional help from doctors and aging professionals. I think it is time for her to be placed so she is cared for and you keep your sanity.
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Kart,

My Dad has a stroke in 2015. He is 90 and has energy for one activity every other day to a max of 3 per week. He does his bed exercises every morning, but additional activity really drains his energy.

An activity could be an appointment, or lunch with friends, shopping etc.

Does your wife have PT that she does at home to maintain her strength? Dad does his bed exercises, and some days lifts free weights, but the weight he lifts has dropped from weights on the dumb bell to just the bar of the dumb bell. A year ago he was walking daily, now he rides an exercise bike occasionally, but that is not load bearing exercise and his legs are getting very weak.
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The stroke no doubt took more out of her than you may have previously realized.
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Yes my wife has OT and PT twice a week. Both of which commented that they have never had a client that changed so abruptly, A couple months ago she was doing so well they were about to discharge her and then they come by for their appointment and she was unable, They helped me get her ready and into the van so I could take her to the emergency room. I talk to the Urologist today about her bladder infections and he said there was only a couple things left for us to try. He is going to scope her when she gets out, but he didn't have a lot of hope that they would find anything . Yes she is on all the regular protocols for prevention of bladder infections as well as those for her bowels.

Her recent memory test showed mark decline, but speech says that she will have to undergo a couple more until she can say it is permanent or just a hiccup. CT scans show no changes. All other blood work shows normal.
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My husband has been diagnosed with MCI due to LBD. He seems completely normal one day and the next day he just sits or naps for hours; mentally really sharp for hours and then confused and forgetful later. He is in a research program for LBD at Mayo and from everything I have learned so far his on again off again ability/behavior is a typical symptom of LBD. No one (but those closest to us and his doctors) knows because he seems fine in familiar situations. And he is a good actor.
It is very important to know what kind of dementia a patient has for both treatment and planning purposes.
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DotyDoty Oct 2019
what is LBD?
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Many good answers here, so all I have to add is this:

If the trouble is getting her from lying down/sitting to standing, the weakness could be due to orthostatic hypotension. A quick and simple test performed by a home health nurse or in the doctor's office can determine this. If this is the problem, allowing her to sit still and quietly before attempting to stand makes all the difference. This would be you "best case scenario" and easily checked for and eliminated as a cause before moving to more difficult to remedy causes.
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Personally speaking, after checking her out for a possible medical solution and doing what you can, I would explode and just let her have it to save my own sanity as the care of her is probably going to land on me. I will not allow this and I do not care why it happens - I am unable to tolerate this from anyone. If it gets really bad and it is causing major negative problems for me, I would place this person in a safe facility. You cannot allow anyone to destroy you or harm you - you don't deserve it......never.
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