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My dad is 83, mom is 81. Dad is rapidly declining in memory/cognitive ability as well as needing assistance physically. Mom also has early dementia. My sister lives with them in a rented house and takes care of them 24/7. Mom helps with dad too, but my sister does most of it. Mom has to bathe and clean dad when he loses bowel control. He is to embarrassed to let sis do it. They are seriously sleep deprived because dad sundowns and tries to get out of bed.he hallucinates and keeps them awake at night. We know he needs a nursing home, but Humana will only pay for one week, after that it is 50.00 per day. The three of them live on 2,400. Per month and at the end of the month there is not even any money for food. They were told they make too much money for Medicaid ..or Medicare . How can they pay for a nursing home for dad and find a place to live for themselves on mom's $610.00 per month which is all she will have to live on if they take dads SS for the NH. someone, please help. We can not get answers from any local senior services. Also, how do I approach a POA for both parents? I live in MA, they live in Fla. My sister can not work and has no income. She tried to get EBTassistance and was declined. There is serious depression going on there bc of the circumstances. How disgusting is it that AMERICAN senior citizens are reduced to living this way. I think growing old in America is sad and my parents are only 18 years older than me! HELP! I send money when possible but it is a bandaid, not a solution.

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You poor dear, call your local or state Agency on Aging and/or you nearest Ombudsman; they will be better able to assist you. It does not have to be this way, you have been ill informed.
As for the DPOA, find an elder lawyer to assist you with this. It should not cost you more than $50 in most cases. They may be able to get you in touch with the proper people to assist your parents and sister in FL too.
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No. When your father passes, your mother will receive his S.S. money......regardless of where he lived, or what condition he was in. She will then forfeit her own S.S. check. I would find out why the Nursing Home is taking your father's money NOW.
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I do not know why your parents would not qualify for Medicaid. Call Area Agency on Aging but also your state Dept. of Human Services, the department that handles elderly issues. The income guidelines are different in each state, so maybe they are over the income level in Fl. It is very sad that elderly like your parents can not get help and yet need nursing home care. This country is heading for a crisis quickly as the population is aging. Was your dad a veteran? Call Veteran's Administration to see if they can help.
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As you line up the DPOAs remember there are two - one for health care decisions and the other for financial. Do this asap for both of your parents in order for you to keep up to date and organized with the bills and medical care when either of them can't do it. If you can help them now while they might still be able to answer questions you might have, then you will hopefully be able to slide smoothly into doing those tedious things even while you handle the stresses that will surely come with the momentary emergencies. Also, if you have a good relationship with your sibling(s) then agree between the two of you who will do best handling the details, often that is a first born. Then one of you could be named the DPOA. This makes it easier to expedite the decisions rather than wait for papers to be double signed etc. especially since there is a traveling distance to factor in. This doesn't mean that person has to make all the decisions though hopefully siblings can discuss the matters but then just one has to sign as things happen.
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They make too much money for Medicaid, but not Medicare as you have mentioned in your question. There are no income limits on Medicare. If your father goes into a nursing home they will take his SS, NOT hers.
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Was your father a veteran and did he serve during a war? If so he may qualify for some benefits for his NH care even if he wasn't in actual combat.
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Please google the "spousal protection act" and it may help provide some answers. We just went thru the same thing with my father.......
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Please consult an elder care attorney who deals with getting people approved for Medicaid. I live in Texas and I know that I was in almost the same situation. The attorney will know all the ins and outs of this. My dad was going to be able to keep Mom's SS. If they make too much the attorney can set up a trust to help qualify your dad for Medicaid. Sometimes these consultations are free....sometimes they cost, but the attorney will be able to say I can help you or I can't. But from experience I bet the attorney can help you with all your problems.
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I think to clarify that if they have Humana they probably have Part C rather than original Medicare. So they wouldn't qualify for MediCARE because they have a replacement type of coverage. I agree that in their state the rules are different than another, so they need to get more information. I would turn to SHINE (Florida's health insurance assistance program -- which provides personal help from trained counselors on all Medicare issues, free of charge). Another resource is floir, Florida's insurance commissioner's office. These two resources can provide a lot of information for seniors and their healthcare. God bless.
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If FL is a 2k/2k state (2 thousand in income and 2 thousand in assets), then combined they are at $ 2,274.57 a month in income. If mom stays as the community spouse and dad goes into NH, he should qualify financially as she gets to keep additional income above the 2K limits to enable her to be living in the community. On the face of it, he should qualify financially for Medicaid. So what do they have in assets? Maybe this is the problem? Assets are more than a house or a car (which are exempt for their lifetime by & large), is there savings or insurance with a cash value; annuity or pension with a cash-out value that is keeping them from being qualified financially? He still needs to qualify medically for NH.

The first day at the NH for couples is called the "snapshot" day and is fixed, set, finite as far as spend-down on assets. If they have assets, you need to get them spent-down on stuff for their future needs before that day: a prepaid NO CASH VALUE funeral or burial or cremation policy; new glasses or hearing aids OR dental work - these have spotty or no coverage on Medicaid. If your sister needs the car, then I'd look to selling it and getting a newer more inexpensive but more reliable car in mom's name with whatever assets they may have in the spend-down.

NH cost 4K - 15K a month, whatever $ you spend on a elder care attorney to get them qualified will be well worth it. Most law schools have pro-bono clinics that they could go to for help. If it comes out that he needs to do a MIller Trust for the income he is over for Medicaid, you kinda need to find the $ to pay an attorney to structure a Miller Trust for you. It will only be a few hundred dollars for fees to get thousand upon thousands of Medicaid dollars of care in the long run. You have to get out there and ask and ask again to make it work. Call their Council of Government Area Aging program to find meal resources, like Meals on Wheels.
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